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Saturday, June 9, 2007 12:00 AM

Paris isn't free -- and neither are we

Paris Hilton's strange celebrity hits a new nadir after Friday's chaotic perp walk. Will we ever be free from her now?

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  • Saturday, June 9, 2007 11:40 AM

    Bush to Pardon Paris!

    George Bush is rumored to be considering a package deal: Scooter AND Paris will be pardoned together. Sources within the Administration say, "The two cases share many essentials in terms of issues of equality before the law. It would simply be wrong to pardon one without doing both. And Bush, after all, is nothing if not a defender of the rule of law. He's the 'Defender'."

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