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Hey Salon--
I've been busy reading 18th century Spanish literature and this is the first I've heard of any of this nonsense (I only read the first paragraph, because it all seemed so absurdly inane). It's not Paris who needs to put down the metaphorical apple martini--it is you. Polluting your mind with stupidity is a personal choice. You are not powerless--au contraire.
Why man, he doth bestride the narrow world
Like a Colossus, and we petty men
Walk under his huge legs and peep about
To find ourselves dishonorable graves...