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Saturday, June 16, 2007 12:00 AM

Why do gyms play such crappy music?

Monotonous techno monopolizes the sound system at my local gym. Is it really the best music for working out?

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  • Friday, June 15, 2007 08:51 PM

    Coconut Monkeyrocket!

    The world would be a better place if gyms played Coconut Monkeyrocket.

    Also:

    -- Messer Chups

    -- The Atlantics (and other surf guitar bands, Dick Dale, etc.)

    -- Yello ("Pumping Velvet," etc.)

    -- Aphex Twin ("Digeridoo," many others)

    -- The "Run Lola Run" soundtrack

    -- Royksopp ("Alpha Male," others)

    -- Front 242 ("Skin")

    -- KMFDM

    -- Tenpole Tudor ("Swords of a Thousand Men")

    -- Orbital ("Lush," "The Box," etc.)

    -- Jean-Jacques Perrey

    -- Nortec Collective

    -- The Avalanches

    -- Can

    -- Bill Laswell

    -- Chemical Brothers

    -- Ulrich Schnauss

    -- Modeselektor ("Vote or Die")

    -- Amon Tobin

    -- The Aquabats

    -- Madness / + any other good ska

    -- Screaming Blue Messiahs ("Smash the Marketplace")

    -- Shriekback ("Nemesis," etc.)

    -- Flaming Lips ("Pompei Gottendammerung")

    -- Kraftwerk ("Tour De France")

    -- James Brown

    -- George Clinton / Parliament

    -- Frankie Smith ("Double Dutch Bus")

    -- David Bowie / Iggy Pop / Roxy Music / and friends

    -- anything on MOTOWN Records

    -- any good old ATLANTIC R&B

    -- 1940s swing from Benny Goodman, Artie Shaw and friends

    -- Xavier Cugat

    -- The Bran Flakes

    -- Tipsy

    -- Ursula 1000

    -- Martinibomb

    -- Montefiori Cocktail

    -- Plastic Bertrand ("Ca Plane Pour Moi")

    -- Yes ("Roundabout," anything with a semi-consistent beat)

    -- Talking Heads

    -- Devo ("Beautiful World," "We Like Explosives," etc. NOT "Whip It")

    -- Thompson Twins ("Love Lies Fierce" and other remixes)

    -- The The

    -- Public Image Limited

    -- Barenaked Ladies

    -- They Might Be Giants

    -- Adam Ant / Bow Wow Wow

    -- Siouxsie / Cocteau Twins / Cure / March Violets

    -- Curve / Laika / Seefeel / The KLF / Saint Etienne

    -- Grandaddy / Postal Service / Radiohead / Blur / Pulp

    -- The Killers / Hot Hot Heat / Yeah Yeah Yeahs

    -- The Go! Team

    -- Any new-music offerings in the int'l ROUGH GUIDE series

    -- 808 State / Eon / Prodigy / Moby / FSOL / Messiah

    -- Yellow Magic Orchestra

    -- "Night on Disco Mountain" / other good disco

    -- the soundtrack to the Katamari Damacy video game

    -- Fela Kuti

    -- Japanese Pop: Halcali, Puffy, 5-6-7-8's, Pizzicato 5, etc.

    -- Bob Wills & the Texas Playboys

    -- Bollywood: from Asha Bhosle to "Bride & Prejudice"

    -- Gary Numan / Ultravox / Nina Hagen / Propaganda

    -- The Art of Noise

    -- Kool & the Gang / Sly & the Family Stone / Stevie Wonder

    -- Giorgio Moroder / Jean-Michel Jarre / Tangerine Dream

    .....but most of all: COCONUT MONKEYROCKET

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