there's that way-too-catchy instrumental intro to "American Idol."

Maybe I've been in marketing too long, but the "pleasant yet unsubstantial" instrumental that opens The Office almost always transports me into the Scranton-area mid-market office supply world.

And strangley enough, I'm being serious. It really gives me a feel for the tone of the show, and puts me in a perfect frame of mind. I usually Tivo the show and watch later, and yet I still watch the opening theme.

Also, please don't forget The Sopranos.

Since the mid-80s, one of my standard shows on Shockwave Radio Theater is Folk Songs for Yuppies: TV Theme Songs. Ah, the glorious days of "The Beverly Hillbillies theme" and "The Gilligan's Island theme"... and many many great songs (as well as a bunch of dumb ones).

More recently, I've been able to do covers of tv theme songs. Desi Arnaz singing "I Love Lucy", Nichelle Nicole singing "Star Trek". The great parody of Led Zeppelin, "Gilligan's Island/Stairway". A Frank Sinatra impersonator doing "The Addams Family theme" ala "New York New York".

Oh, what the kids of today are missing.

Entourage has an awesome opening song. "Oh YEAH! OH YEAH!"

Even though Six Feet Under opening was instrumental it still kicked butt. Oh, and Curb Your Enthusiasm has a fun intro.

...Not written for the show. "Superhero" by Jane's Addiction from the album "Strays". Really good fit, though!

...was not written for the show either. David Chase heard it on KCRW and had his people talk to their people.

I think there's a worry on the behalf of TV producers that their shows will be taken less seriously if they have them. Unique theme songs these days have to be either self-consciously cheesy (Family Guy) or blink-and-you'll-miss them (Studio 60). The last show I can remember trying to do an earnest unique theme song with lyrics is King of Queens, and in my opinion it still came out cheesy.

So, most producers end up doing a sort of compromise, taking an existing song that most people haven't heard so that it ends up feeling specific to the show even though it wasn't actually written for it. For the most part I'm a fan of this practice, as it exposes me to bands I wouldn't otherwise know about; and I would argue that there is true artistry involved in matching already-written songs to a story. (After all, that's how Singin' in the Rain was made.)

TV theme songs are a great part of TV history, but I think they're inextricably entwined with an earlier, less subtle age of television. I do miss them, but I wouldn't trade the quality of today's best shows for anything.

Monk has had not one but two theme songs.

For the first two or three years, it had an instrumental theme that I thought was pretty good. I assume that it's original -- I haven't heard it anywhere else.

Then, they had Randy Newman write and perform a new theme song (It's a Jungle Out There), which I like.

Of course, Monk is shown on cable (the USA network), so it's probably not as well known as a network show.

I think every television show and more than half of all commercials use a Who song now.

The last TV show with a really great instrumental opening was "Miami Vice", and that was (my God) 23 years ago. I can still remember the theme music to such shows as "The Rookies" and "Quincy", neither of which are considered classic shows. But their theme music rocked!

The great, self-referential, snarky "This is the theme to Garry's show, the opening theme to Garry's show, Garry called me up and asked if I would write a theme song..." from It's Garry Shandling's Show - his odd not-quite-sitcom prior to the Larry Sanders era.

Go right to the source and ask the horse.

Unfortunately, Mr. Ed will never speak unless he has something to say.

A few years back a friend and I wrote the theme to "Hope and Faith," the ABC show with Kelly Ripa and Faith Ford. After a successful first season the producers inexplicably replaced our piece with a new song that was subsequently slammed online by fans of the show as being bland and unoriginal. The trend in advertising as well is to shy away from anything too catchy or jingly.

A vibey piece of instrumental music can set a great tone for visuals. But as a professional composer/songwriter I wish I had more opportunities to write melody and lyric driven pieces. Much more memorable in my opinion, especially for main title TV themes.

Three short words: "Out of fashion."

Wouldn't it be nice to be able to sing the theme to "24?"

I came up with some cool lyrics that you can sing to the Electric Company theme while the show's starting?

We're gonna shoot some guys

We're gonna give 'em the treatment

We're gonna punch their eyes,

Beat 'em till they cry

n' give themselves away

Just give me 24 today-ay-ay-ay

Just give me 24 today-ay-ay-ay

Before they blow us all away-ay-ay-ay!

and the credits, too. They need every available second for the actual TV show. On DVD, an episode of Gray's Anatomy runs 42 minutes -- 18 minutes are set aside for commercials. I assume that other shows are similar. Is a song, whether custom-tailored or an off-the-shelf pop song, worth cutting in to those pitiful few remaining minutes?

I think they ought to put the credits in a crawl like the news shows do and go with wall-to-wall narrative for their 42 minutes. Better still, refer the viewers to their web site for the credits.

Besides, are the TV themes you cherish really all that great, or do they merely evoke memories of the shows themselves? How many shows you didn't like had, in your opinion, a great theme song?

10-11 minutes is the standard. Of course between the idios that's now about 15% of the screen, the popup triple sized animated crawl it's hardly worth it to tune in anymore. And you do of course realize that full digital to everyone TV will ensure that you get to watch ads 100% of the time on some of the screen real estate don't you? Of course you understood that. That will be your bargain with the devil once digital is pervasive. All that smart bandwidth. Of course if that means they can implement multiple tuners in software and leave me to have 4 or more simultaneous screens up that might be a bargain I'm willing to make.