I agree with alarajrogers. I read all sorts of things--fantasy, science fiction, mysteries, "literary" fiction, my local paper, Salon, and the sides of cereal boxes. But only one of those categories makes it into the local paper's book review section.

Yes, I'll be the first to admit that there is a certain amount of crap published under the science ficiton and fantasy labels. However, there is also a lot of truly imaginative, well written, creative work published there, that will NEVER see any paper's book review section. Book reviews are for literary fiction, blessed by people who obviously must know better than me what I ought to be reading to truly develop my intellectual capacity.

Hogwash.

If the movie reviewers can review everything from the latest Spider-Man flick to the independent art-house movies, why can't the book reviewers do the same? Obviously they can't review every book, but they could make an effort to look beyond the ends of their rarified noses into a few other sections of the bookstore once in a while.

You will be asked this question in EVERY interview you go to. It's standard procedure.

I was laid off from a dying company a few years back, and in the excellent "outplacement" training (nice euphemism for "we just sacked you, here's three days with this nice guy to learn how to brush up your resume"), the trainer gave some very good advice.

No one, especially a prospective employer, wants to hear your bile, bitterness, anger, unhappiness, or whatever about your last job and how it ended. You do not want to give even one whit of impression that you bear them any malice whatsoever. Your personal feelings on this are NOT important. Your ability to give a good impression is of the utmost importance.

In this context, you are an actor. So you need to script your response to this question. Practice it at home in front of a mirror. Practice it to your best friend at a coffee shop. Practice it until you can sing it in the shower.

Your answer needs to be reasonably close to the truth, in case they check up on it. But it needs to be calm, pleasant, unjudgemental, matter-of-fact, and believable, so the interviewer can move on to what's really important, your stellar resume, all the great skills you bring them from your last employer, and all the reasons they should hire you.

So... get busy. Build a great story. Embellish the good parts, skim the bad parts, and get it down pat. What they're really asking is "are you a shmuck?" Of course you're not. But to tell the truth, as Cary advocates, gives them way too much information, and goes too close to all the feelings you need to hide for an interview.

Good luck.

Best advice I ever got after a devastating breakup came from a dear friend who lost a parent to cancer.

Grieving for anything takes a lot of time. Imagine a really big pile of rice. I can't say how big it is, maybe even you can't, but it's big. Slowly, one by one, you will have to pick up every single grain and move it to somewhere else. There is no fast way to do this. You don't get a shovel, you don't even get to use handfuls. Just one grain at a time. Every memory, every thought, every shared experience, every dream about the future. One by one by one. Some days you'll turn away from the pile and ignore it for a while. That's OK. Some time, next month, next year, who knows when, you'll realize that the pile is a little smaller. Some times the grains of rice will demand to be moved when you least expect them, some memory in the grocery store or the gas station. Some day in the future, you'll have moved it all and realize that you are done.

The truth to take from this analogy is that there is no fast track. Everyone's grief is different... different size pile, different number of grains. But the process is the same, picking up one grain at a time, thinking about it, and moving it.

Good luck.

Does poverty affect women's health?

Does not being able to provide for a child affect women's health?

Does carrying a pregnancy to term and then giving a child up for adoption affect a woman's health?

Yes to all of these. Kee-rist, if another person comes by and says abortion is something women truly don't "understand" I'll barf. I really will. Women understand all too well what it means to bring an unwanted life into the world.

Great thread, fun to read.

When my kids were little and first started to ride bikes, I got bike flags for them. When I noticed how much they catch my eye, I bought one for myself. Big tall dorky-looking wavy fiberglass pole with an orange flag on top. I don't see them much on other bikes, but I'm just as religious about them now as I am about wearing a helmet. I made my husband put one on his bike too.

I don't ride after dark much, and I don't commute to work by bike, but I am trying to do local errands by bike when I can.

A flag doesn't solve every problem, it doesn't make bike lanes where there are none (I could carry on about that but so many other posters have already done that), but unless you're Lance Armstrong and trying to save every half-gram of weight, go get a flag and be visible. $9.99 from your local bike shop.