I've never bought Obama's "New Politics" line, for many of the reasons you mention. A person who is an alum of Harvard Law, the Illinois legislature, and the US Senate is not exactly what I'd call a renegade or an outsider. He feeds at exactly the same money trough as everyone else and plays by the same rules. Plays very skillfully, I might add.

So I'm starting this fall season never having been a strong Obama fan. But the things that will motivate me to vote for him are things like his opponent saying the economy is "fundamentally sound" on the same day the fed bailed out AIG to the tune of $85 billion (after having bailed out the two federal mortgage companies last week--amount undisclosed); and after two venerable Wall St. banks collapsed at the weekend. Sound for whom? Well, I guess, for people with so many houses they can't remember how many they actually own, John. And maybe sound for gala 11, but definitely not sound for me or anyone I know personally.

Also a huge burr under my saddle: John McCain has had a number of bouts with melanoma and is not in robust health. He dies, and we get Rambo Barbie, the Wolf Hunter in Pink. At her most benign, the best we could expect would be that she'd do no more damage than George Bush and Bruce Cheney. Like him, she seems to regard any thought that pops into her brain as put there personally by God (a fire-breathing, child-eating Babylonian-style deity), and therefore beyond questioning. Not that too many new thoughts ever pop up. She reminds me exactly of what people said--rational people--about Adolf Hitler. He was such a martinet, such a joke, such a raving loonie. Nobody could take him seriously, right? He'd never last, no one would ever actually follow such a quirky nut job with the caricature mustache and the bad hair. This was the country of Beethoven and Goethe, of Schopenhauer and Luther. Well, follow him they did, and a hundred million people died.

She makes people believe in magic, that real problems have simple, easy, and quick solutions. All we have to do to be respected in the world is KICK SOME FOREIGN ASS! YEAH!! All we have to do to solve an energy crisis that has been 50 years in the making is DRILL, BABY, DRILL! Fix the economy? Kick some foreign--no wait, MORE TAX CUTS FOR THE WEALTHY! And so on. Why, she almost doesn't need a brain at all! A five-year-old could run the country. And the country she and her true believers envision could be run by a five-year old. It's just that the real United States, the country we actually live in, needs a thoughtful, careful grown-up.

That Palin's platform is also McCain's is both sad and disturbing. This same platform has been failing since the beginning of 2001, which is reason enough to stop pretending such childish thinking is going to solve anything, and reason enough to get off my butt and support my second-choice candidate. Given the seriousness of our current situation, Obama vs. McCain is like Lincoln vs. Spongebob. Gala 11 is welcome to Mr. Squarepants, but I'll take Lincoln.

I believe it was Ms. Lamott's friend Fr. Tom who once observed that at 6 p.m. on Good Friday, the crucifixion looked like a win for the Romans. Never, never, ever underestimate the power of love. The route of aggression may seem quicker, but it is usually just the flip side of the same coin we're trying to get rid of. Kindness and toughness are not opposites. Christ and Buddha were both as kind as anyone would ever imagine, but also just as uncompromising and just as tough about what it takes to foment change. The thing is, they started by teaching us to change the one thing we have some control over: Ourselves.

I know loving our enemies sounds frankly disgusting, and most days I have a hard enough time loving my friends. I am so angry at people who act like being stupid is a cardinal virtue--"I'm the governor of Alaska, and I'm ready to be president; here, take my brain, I don't need it!"--that I can hardly see straight. The only person whose cardio-vascular system suffers from this is me. So loving my enemies should be on the top of list of ways in which I can change myself. I can't think of anything more revolutionary.

Of course it's humiliating having to love someone who is both a moron and thinks I'm a wimp for trying not to hate them. What I do when I start to feel that way is picture the Dalai Lama. He seems like such an incredibly sweet man, so full of love and compassion, and he is all those things. One thing he is not, however, is a wimp. For example, he scares the crap out of China. Talk about the power of love! He may not have won his struggle yet, but he will. And when he does, there will be no losers, only winners. That is the real power of love.

I was going to say it's because I lived overseas for 13 years and speak four languages besides English, but I realized that would be way more of a negative. Let's see...

OK: You can see Mexico from my parents' house. I used to drive an American car until someone in a Toyota smashed into me. I've been to Wall Street. I know what a Euro is. I know the Georgia Russia invaded isn't the one north of Florida. I've been downsized or had my job go offshore three times. During the current administration, I saw my income plummet to levels I hadn't experienced in more than 20 years. I have 10 pairs of cowboy boots. I know how to drive a truck. And last, but not least...

I know how to kill and clean a chicken!

Vote for me!!!