Beat asses sitting around making phone calls every time. Oh, you wanna talk technology? Mapquest and GPS can't hang up on you.

The Obama campaign has the boots on the ground. This is how they won the primary (boots on the ground at the caucuses, Baby), and this is how they will win on Tuesday.

The O.C. has the whole state of Florida divided up into tiny little chunks, with canvassers in each chunk. It's likely that, by now, a very large percentage of all Obama supporters in Fla. have already voted for him--thanks in large measure to the canvassers.

I have a scene in my mind of Karl Rove (as played by the late, great John Candy) out canvassing in Florida, where the temps are probably still in 80s, or even 90s. By the time Rove hits the third house, he's sweating like a pig, and he sits down on the curb and says, "Okay . . . that's enough for one day. My heart's beatin' like a rabbit! Think I'll go hit the phone banks!"

The economy was supposed to rebound when Americans started buying plasma-screen televisions in large numbers. Americans didn't buy the plasma-screens like they were supposed to because a) they're so broke they have to sell their own plasma at the blood bank and b) even if they could afford a plasma, there's nothing on it worth watching, anyway.

I just got back from the blood bank. If I find out they're using my plasma in a tv, I'm gonna be pissed!

I can't remember where I read it (probably Salon), or who said it (no doubt a Dem political consultant) but probably a year or so ago, this Washington, Dem, Insider consultant, talking (glowingly) about Barack Obama, said, "You never know when the next Bobby Kennedy is going to walk through your door."

Barack is our Bobby Kennedy, praise God and Hallelujah!

I truly believe that if you are old enough to remember Bobby, and to have loved his soul, then that accounts for your fear, anguish, paranoia, and hope before the election, and your elation and tears of joy and relief now. And we must also give thanks and praise to Dr. King. Always, always.

Barack stands proudly on the shoulders of Bobby and Martin, as no one else in our lifetime could.

The guy who threw the shoes is probably one of the few Iraqis left who has both feet.

From that distance (and shouting the whole time) I thought the guy's aim was awesome. With a little practice, he could perfect the "curveshoe."

Shoeless Joe Jackson woulda been proud!

If there is a way that the airlines can f*ck something up and and make their passengers/customers miserable, they will do it.

Every time.

1. Wonder why GK, "Mister Minnesambo," is in Florida this time of year?

2. Are you planning on attending the Inauguration, GK, or is it too cold for you in D.C. this time of year?

3. If Minnesota is such a paradise and Minnesotans such great, strong, folksy-type folks, then a)Why aren't you in Minnesota right now and b)why did Minnesotans come within 250 votes of re-electing that douchebag, Norm Coleman?

Time magazine ALMOST chose Palin as "Person of the Year." Over Barack Obama. I give up. Again.

Committee to Condi: "Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out!"

Unless you're the Dixie Chicks? I hate to lay a bummer on the festival, as it were, but the Dixie Chicks should have headlined this gig, and yet they weren't even booked? Springsteen, Bono and Pete Seger are truly heroes of Democracy. No argument there.

But within the context of nightmare of the last 8 years, the Dixie Chicks top the list of artistic heroes, and should be honored, not ignored.

Based on the real shoe-throwing video:

1. Guy with a radar gun standing behind Bush. Holds up radar gun to "clock" each shoe throw.

2. After the second "brush-back" shoe pitch, Bush throws down bat and "storms the mound."

3. Shoe-thrower screams, "This'll teach ya to trade Sammy Sosa, ya bum!"

4. Umpire standing behind Bush picks up each shoe, checks the stitching, hands it to a catcher who throws it back to the "pitcher."