Steven Colbert is funny, but he's not as funny as Bill O'Reilly. But Steven is at a disadvantage. He only pretends to be a pinheaded nutball. Bill is the real deal and a loofah king to boot.

If the Intelligent Designer is so smart, how do we explain cockroaches, slime mold and Bill O'Reilly? How about unintelligent design? According to the gnostics, the world was created by a minor god who was in over his head. Their creation myth fits the observable facts more than does the Genesis myth. Maybe I should take a cue from the creationist lobby and complain that the public schools aren't teaching my favorite myth.

If the dead can contact the living, why do they always talk to sleazy hustlers? I haven't seen a psychic yet who doesn't seem to be running a con job. Maybe I'm being unfair, but if a creature looks like a duck, waddles like a duck and quacks like a duck, just maybe it really is a duck.

Once more we are reminded, everything you hear from Fox is wrong.

New York Giant HOF first baseman Bill Terry once said "Baseball must be a great game to survive the fools who run it." Yes, Bill, the fools are still in charge; George Steinbrenner is exhibit A, and Bud Selig is exhibit B. But now Fox has joined the anti-baseball conspiracy. Can baseball survive Rupert Murdoch as well as George and Bud and the rest of the dunces?

Even though Fox's evil minions have their hands on the games, the World Series has been wonderful. As an Atlanta Braves fan, I didn't know much about the White Sox. I knew the Astros were good, to my and my favorite team's sorrow, but the Sox are better (or at least, more fortunate, so far). Note to any other network: Won't someone please take the World Series away from Fox? By comparison, even ESPN looks good.

Now that Bush has caved in to the whiny right wing, who will he nominate to the Supreme Court? Roy Moore, Jerry Falwell, Fred Phelps? The possibilities are endless and disgusting.

Kay Bailey Hutchison is a hypocrite and a cheap political hack. Her attempts to distinguish between Clinton's perjury and the alleged perjury of Bush's minions is idiotic. If the woman had any shame, she would resign. Fortunately for her, she is shameless, just like her lord and master, George the Younger.

Q. How can you tell when George Bush is lying?

A. Watch his lips. When they move, he's lying.

Time for you boys to start practicing your perp walks.

Here's the word on Kay Baby from the horse himself, Georgie Porgie. "Kay is not so a hypocrite. There is a difference between Democrats and Republicans lying to grand juries. Democrats lie because they're bad people. Republicans lie for reasons of national security and stuff. We're protecting you from bad people, terrorists, cultural relativists, lesbian agendas, street mimes and such. You know that we know what we're doing and we'll always do what's doable, in a proactive sort of way, given budget constraints, tax cuts, corporate kickbacks, and Scooter and Karl's bail money. So trust us. We're right, and they are wrong, whoever they are, because they know who they are, and so are we."

If Bush sends up another Scalia clone nutboy for nomination, we'll see whether the moderate Republicans have any guts. Bush is weakened. The rancid right doesn't have a majority in the Senate. If the moderates have any guts, they can tell Fat Jerry Falwell and the rest of the born again bigots to go straight to Hell.

Thanks for the shoeshine joke. Too bad about those who didn't get it. Sometimes irony is lost on the clueless.

Scott McClellan think he has earned someone's trust, the media's, the public's, whatever. Sorry, Scott. You haven't earned my trust in very much, although I do trust that you are in excellent contention for the Ron Ziegler Lying Weasel of the Year award. But it will be tough. So many weasels, so many lies.

I can't wait to hear the spin on this by the Bush sycophants. They'll all have to cowboy up for this spin job. Kay Baby will spin herself into the ground trying to distinguish between good perjury and bad perjury, Rush will have to go back on the hillbilly heroin, Sean Hannity will have to eat a pig, and Bill O'Reilly will need a few overtime session with his loofahs.

Kay Baby will get you off the hook. Just use the "I forgot" defense, as in: "I forgot that Dick Cheney was vice president. I thought he was a reporter. I thought Tim Russert was vice president. Is Karl Rove a reporter or was that Karl Marx or maybe Groucho?"

When did strangers get the idea that they could ask personal questions and expect answers? A lot of people are nosy and rude. If you don't know someone well enough to ask a personal question, just don't do it.

Despite the pooh-poohs of Bush administration suck-ups like Kay Baby Hush-your-mouth, Scooter did not misspeak himself. He lied like a cheap rug to obstruct justice. Why? Is Scooter a moron or was he desperately trying to hide something? Scooter won't be the only casualty. Someone else is going down. Don't make any long-term plans, Karl.

Bush has decided to completely cave in to the born again bigots by nominating one of their boys to the Supreme Court. He is hoping that the Republican moderates will bow to his will and support Alito. I hope at least some of the moderates remember the spirit of Barry Goldwater. When Reagan appointed Sandra Day O'Connor to the Court, Jerry Falwell whined and said that every good Christian should be concerned. Barry Goldwater responded by saying that every good Christian should line up to kick Falwell's ass. Come on, Olympia Snowe, Susan Collins, John McCain, Lincoln Chafee, here is your chance to kick Jerry around the block. Do it.