Thank you, thank you, thank you. So many modern American eugenicists are frightening to see. I had considered posting a letter here using statistics from the African American community regarding the increased likelihood that young men will end up in trouble (vs. young white men), that families will live below the poverty line (vs. white families), that individuals will not pursue or have the resources to obtain higher education, that such individuals have a higher chance of kidney failure, high blood pressure, type II diabetes, and certain serious hereditary blood disorders, and the many other disadvantages that result simply from being an African American in this culture. I was going ask "Who should or would even want to have a child knowing that these odds exist against that child?" I was going to wait until the end of the letter to mention that being African-American was the differentiating factor.

Aside from that, pro-choice is NOT pro-someone-else's-choice. Why does everyone want a hand in women's wombs??? The eugenicists here are neither pro-choice nor pro-life. (Do not kid yourselves, you supposed progressives who would make these decisions for others.) Actually, this is one of the sub-texts of what the pro-life contingent fears as a secret agenda of pro-choice advocates: that the reason we want to keep abortion legal and accessible is so that we can steer “undesirables” toward it as part of a “master plan” to rid the world of those we don’t consider among our “ivory tower elites.” How fun I'm sure it would be for the Drudge Report to put a nice permalink to this discussion, so that the fundies can go ahead and claim proof such a plot exists among us.

I understand and honor any individual’s choice to have or not have children for whatever personal reasons they may have. Ms. Casey at no point asks us or the world for our advice. Rather, she elucidates her own considerations and experiences in her internal struggle. Her question is to herself, and is otherwise rhetorical. I was drawn to the article to see how it compared to my own experience in my decisions and feelings, not to give her my opinion. What I give to her is a simple statement of commiseration at the difficulty of the complexity of the decision, and my sorrow that should she have a child it will be born into a world that will fear it so greatly and judge her so harshly.

Those who would go so far as to tell a perfect stranger what decision they should – or worse – MUST make are practicing eugenics. Unless you are a professional being consulted in that capacity (a geneticist being asked about the chances of passing on a disorder, for instance), you should keep your misguided, prejudiced, fear-based opinions to yourself. If you have bipolar disorder, or have a parent or relative who has it, you are an expert on exactly the number of cases with which you have direct familiarity. Just as each individual is unique, each case is unique in manifestation and tolerability. Even when my husband and I consulted a geneticist, she gave nothing but odds – NO advice one way or the other.

L.B.S., I did want to let you know that my grandmother was bi-polar and had a very difficult time. None of her children, who had difficult childhoods because of it, decided to forgo having kids of their own. None of my cousins did, either. My brother is fine. I have one other cousin who has experienced similar problems to mine, and she has four lovely kids and several grandchildren. (she's fifty-four)

When I lost my baby, my gyn. left my ovaries intact. She actually suggested surrogacy after seeing the pain my husband and I were feeling. (Which I didn’t consider, so rest easy eugenicists.) Both my M.S. doctor AND my psychiatrist have at no point seen any reason why I could not or should not have had children. My parents and in-laws were disappointed at my choice not to have kids before my surprise pregnancy, and deeply saddened when they found out about my miscarriage.

It's not about entitlement to children. It's about the fact that people DO have children, and no class or type of free person should automatically be excluded from that choice by anyone else in this society. To do so is eugenics, plain and simple.

I “got” the bitter sarcasm of that previous post too L.B.S.. The SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP in response, by the same person who went on to describe the level of discourse one expects to see here was the only laugh I've gotten out this whole mess.