If you read what I think was my first post (I've lost track) I pointed out somewhat similar attacks that were perpetrated upon John Kerry. Who was, last time I checked, male (although he didn't grow balls big enough for my tastes until after the election).

There's two issues at play here: 1) Women's looks and age are taken into account much more often then those of men when deciding whether or not they can do a job, and 2) Conservatives have a tendency to launch childish, schoolyard-bully-level attacks on Democratic candidates.

You keep bringing up how male physical attributes are also criticized, but you're comparing apples and oranges. Has anyone ever said "he's too short to be president" or "his hair is too grey to be president" or "he's not handsome enough to be president" or "he's too chubby to be president"? NO. Male candidates are not judged that way. And what, we wouldn't be watching a MALE president "aging before our very eyes"? The male candidates all drink from the fountain of youth?

That's what happened here, and what we're talking about... conservative commentators expressed the concern that Americans would not want to watch a woman aging on a daily basis, right before our very eyes. No such concern was raised over either a male or a conservative candidate. Period.

Wondering if Ronald Reagan's advanced age would hinder his presidential abilities was justified. Wondering if Hillary Clinton's unsightly wrinkles would hinder hers is not. It really IS that simple.

This is a very thought-provoking subject!

One other thing I find customer reviews really useful for is what another poster mentioned... what is omitted elsewhere.

I'm a Mac person. So whenever I am in the market for software or accessories, Mac compatibility is job one... and that isn't always readily apparent from the info given. Often, even if the info says it is Mac-compatible, only the customer reviews usually tell me whether or not the thing actually works WELL with a Mac, plus they're often full of useful tips, pointers and workarounds.

In general, I look to the customer reviews to tell me whether or not to believe the hype. Those noise-cancelling earphones that are on sale look great in the sales blurb... but only the customer reviews will tell you they sound tinny, and fall apart after a week of normal use.

(Hey Lestat... I wonder if it was the same robe! LOL! Charter Club. I almost fell for it because I have Charter Club towels and I like them just fine.)

...that perhaps the BF is not as "separated" as he would have the LW believe, and maybe the estranged wife herself will be at the family holiday celebration? Or maybe he will be visiting his "former" in-laws during the holidays as well, with the wife?

These things do happen, I'm afraid. When they tell you they're separated, there's often stuff going on behind the scenes that they don't share with you... and even after a couple of years as the girlfriend of a "separated" man, you might wake up one day to find that they're back together, have bought a new house and are expecting a baby.

Always take care of you. A relationship should be PART of your life. Your entire life shouldn't hinge upon it.

No one's approaching this from the man's point of view because we didn't hear from him. We heard from the woman.

Ah, that episode of Sex and the City. I'm a woman, and I wanted to smash Carrie's head into a wall when she showed up at the church. What an idiot. Has she no dignity? She really got what she deserved. No means no, and that goes both ways.

But you missed the most important thing... it wasn't that Mr. Big wanted his alone-time with mom. It was that he had never even told mom about Carrie. Carrie didn't mean enough to him. Remember he said he didn't want to introduce mom to yet ANOTHER girlfriend... unless she was "the one." He simply did not want to give Carrie that position in his life. She wasn't "the one."

The LW has already met BF's mom. The family is aware that he has a girlfriend. Yet he still didn't invite her home. One must wonder why. Did mom not like her? Is the wife still in the picture, and is his family maybe holding out for a reconciliation? Is the LW just not "the one," so he doesn't want to integrate her into family events?

No, we don't know the man's side. All we can really do is speak from our own experiences. Many of us have been in this situation, and we're only trying to make her aware of a few factors she may not be considering. We're not saying we're necessarily right... just that she needs to keep her eyes and her mind open.