Letters to the Editor
Jeff Bowles
Published Letters: 111 Editor's Choice: 12
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Wow! Lots of action and good advice, I'd say...
[Read the article: My husband is groping my sister]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]The person who wrote on "Monday, October 29, 2007 12:56 AM" as Anonymous, gave a great list of things to do: talk to the family, make it clear what's going on, get his attention and get LW's thoughts in order...
... and most importantly, don't hide anything from anyone. (The kids are a separate matter.)
The one who wrote, "get checked for STDs immediately and do NOT have any physical contact with him until you hear from HIS doctor -- which might involve a three-way conversation where you say, Honey, tell the doctor to spill the beans about everything" (this is not a direct quote), also got it on the money.
The real question is, what the hell is going on? Why is your sister screwing around in any way with your husband, and why does he think it's okay -- at best -- to treat her as someone to get shit-faced with?
You can dump him. I wouldn't, because I think it's too easy an out and the kids DO figure into such decisions.
But you can't dump your sister. It doesn't work that way. It would be so much easier if it were your best friend, but if you try to dump your sister, she'll still be hanging around your neck like a dead albatross for the rest of your very long life.
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Where to start? Perhaps with the term, "racist"....
[Read the article: Our new friend is a racist -- should we dump him?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Look, if you say the word "racist" in a conversation with someone, you've already labeled yourself in addition to the creep you're trying to dress down.
It (and its counterparts, "sexist", "homophobic", and others) labels you as the moral arbitrator in the crowd. It is a particularly unproductive path to take.
If the guy's a jerk about racial issues, or close-minded about them, say it when doing so is productive. You can even be confrontational about it: "Jack, we really can't have you running down black folks (sic) around Junior. It just isn't how we believe you teach children to look at the world. People are people, and there's enough good and bad people of any race that it's just lousy to turn him against someone he doesn't know and hasn't even met."
The implication is, keep pulling this behavior and you'll lose us as friends.
I walked away from one 'friend' when he responded (to a complaint I made on a mailing list when everyone started posting in French because they thought it was cute and there were no translations or apologies) that I was racist for expressing my opinion. My response was, pretty much, "f*ck you".
You call someone a word ending with -ist, and that's the standard retort. No way around it.
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It's wild, but there's merit to it...
[Read the article: Trading preschool for passports]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Time's awastin'.
I am not sure if this is the brightest idea, or the dumbest, but do know that it could be something you'd all talk about for the rest of your life.
Take pictures. A real camera, maybe digital and maybe film. Don't forget that the cardboard/plastic disposables might feel cheap, but make great pictures. If you lose one over the side of a boat or train, you don't care.
I would say that you want to point them at trains and boats.
Teach them addition and reading so they are ready for school, but you can do that in a train, too...
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Shocked! Shocked!
[Read the article: Riding the XX Express]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]The female-only bus is not a solution.
It is a secondary symptom of the problem.
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Weird old WHAT?
[Read the article: Blood-and-guts politics]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]John McCain's courage under torture during the Vietnam War deserves everyone's gratitude and respect. But as a national candidate, the stumpy, uptight McCain is a lemon. Oy, that weaselly voice and those dated locutions and stilted intonations. Who needs a weird old coot with a short fuse in the White House? This isn't a smart game plan for the war on terror.
Oh, let's stop right there.
This paragraph is an example of the sort of mumbling that cheapens the political process. He might be lousy because of his temperment, because he has supported the wrong laws or policies in the past, or because he lies in bed with Dubya when necessary. (He might even be suspect because no one who has spent years as a P.O.W. truly can be called "normal" again. I think it gave him patience, which we saw in the Abramoff/Delay scandal.)
But, really, darling. Take a hint from the Op-Ed writers of the Times: be a journalist, first, and an author second.
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Make up your mind. You're heading for a breakup...
[Read the article: My boyfriend danced dirty to make me jealous ]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]It's very simple. He's your boyfriend, and she's his ex. You can take that as a compliment, treat him as a trophy (that acts up from time to time), and gloat that she got a grind with him but you went home with him...
... or you can whine until you become his ex, also.
My advice: say, one time and only one time, "this bugged me until I realized that I was the one who took you home - not her. I will not bring this up again."
(I might be right, and I might be wrong. But, this is one guy's perspective on the matter. Do you want to take the chance that it's his perspective, also? Put it behind you.)
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Oh, fercrissake...
[Read the article: John F. Kennedy, plagiarist?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]It is so much easier to throw around words ending with -ist than to actually DO something constructive, isn't it?