I'm dismayed by the tone of this article, which seems to advocate for the slaughter of some animals because they are not as cute or not as domesticated, while protecting other animals because they are "man's best friend."

I'll start this by saying that I'm not vegetarian anymore... but reading this made me think maybe I should rethink my choice to eat meat.

Traveling in India will give you a different sense of what kinds of animals are "traditionally" considered part of the home. Even in most cities, many homes have cows that come home to spend the night indoors, as part of the family. In the Middle East, Asia, and parts of Europe even today cows, goats and other animals we in America might consider just food animals actually come into the family home. They generate warmth, families name them and treat them like extensions of the family or working pets, etc. I have a wonderful picture of a man nuzzling nose to nose with an older calf on a main thoroughfare Puri, Orissa with the kind of gentleness and love you'd expect from a dog owner in America. Dogs are not really widely kept as pets in India, and in fact the state of the dog population there is a bit dire at times, but cows are certainly part of the fabric of family life. So, putting religious views aside and just looking at it from this context, it's easy to see why it's considered completely unacceptable to kill and eat a cow in India. Yet the author argues that it's okay to kill cows because as far as he's concerned, they're made to be eaten, whereas dogs are not. It's ridiculous.

This is not the only article in Salon that has suffered from some measure of cultural incompetence and cultural prejudice; I am not saying that the inhumane treatment of animals is ever excusable. But when you refer to PETA, I would suggest that you consider that people who work for PETA are typically vegans who value the lives of all animals, and they'd probably be horrified at the argument that some animals lives are worth more than others, especially based on arbitrary culturally-specific opinions.

Anyway, after reading this I'm seriously considering becoming vegetarian again, to resolve some of my own inconsistencies. But at least my resolve to eat only free-range, organic meats is strengthened.

As so many people have said here, this is just about being nice, and being honest. It's also about getting things straight with your husband.

I once had a friend who completely overstepped his bounds and was taking advantage of my kindness when I offered free professional services to him. I got really annoyed and finally decided to confront him. I thought about all the things I liked about him and the reasons why we were friends. And that's how I started the conversation.

Then I very politely told him that I realized that when I offered my help that I didn't realize it would take so much out of me, and that I really needed to step back, that I was happy to help but I just needed to balance it with other things; that I didn't feel like my help was entirely appreciated and that maybe we could work out a way by which he could get the help he needed and I could get the appreciation I needed, either through payment or trade or some other thing.

Things were a little awkward at first - he was afraid of offending me or asking for help again. So I offered help when I knew he needed it, and then said, "and you can take me to lunch next week to thank me - when would you like to get together?" Everything ended up working out well - we both got what we needed.

Setting boundaries is healthy and positive; rather than focusing on how annoying your cousin is, do a little mea culpa with her and say you've realized you need a little more personal space and privacy at home, and you would love for her to use the pool but just would like a phone call, and maybe set up some boundaries in terms of what times and days are okay and what are not; that if you're entertaining guests it's inappropriate, etc. Admit fault for not realizing this would be a problem, and have the conversation with compassion and good humor.

And then invite them and the aunt/uncle over for a pool party, and have them bring part of the main course.

Family and boundaries are a healthy combination, and create more harmony together. Try it!

...having some information ready about public pools or other facilities in the area at her disposal might be a good backup plan for the days your pool is not available. ;)