Letters to the Editor
ololon
Published Letters: 77 Editor's Choice: 14
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But can he teach?!?
[Read the article: I'm a jazz pianist, nearly 50, and I need to make some real money!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Hate to rain on the "let him teach" parade, but not everyone can teach, let alone enjoy teaching. Nor is it such a cake walk to grab teaching gigs anywhere, even in the private school sector, in any field rife with struggling people just like our Piano Man.
Teaching is, however, the most practical course to pursue, and the one the least likely to discriminate against his age. There -- I've said it -- he may be considered too old for a whole bunch of options so many well-intentioned advice givers suggest. Truth is, after he's done with whatever initial training, there aren't all that many years left before retirement, and very few employers are going to want to hire him. He wants longevity and security, but can't offer much of either in return. Yeah, yeah, I know he's not old -- and he's not -- but retirement age is 65 and very few professions want workers past that age. He should try, because anything can happen, but the chances of him becoming a working lawyer (and can we say TUITION?!?) are slim. Not only that, but he's worked his ass off and should be able to parlay his experience into come career without switching tracks so drastically.
Music studios? Record companies? Sound engineers for film & TV? Sure, there are technical degrees associated with the jobs, but not all -- experience counts here, if the temperament suits. Changing locations may be necessary, but PM is lucky -- no family, no ties, so moving is possible. He may have to start on an intern level, but he'll make what he makes now and, given his experience, should be able to move up rather quickly.
PM, look into all aspects of the music industry before you press your own CD's. And, with the double degrees, you can teach on any level (very few PhD's in Fine Arts, so the double MA's should do you even on the university level), and should perhaps explore all levels to find one that you like. Geez, but all of these people who lump all teaching together, as if anyone can do it, anytime, for anyone! No wonder teachers are so devalued in this country!! Anyway... I do believe Teach for America is aimed at recent grads, but most states have programs to recruit secondary school teachers with life experience. Community colleges look for adjuncts every summer, and accept applications for their teaching pools all year, so that's a foot in the door and experience for a CV. Then there's the senior college/university route, which your alma mater should be able to help you crack -- call your MA granting institution, get a hold of the career counselor, and shake until something comes out. They get these inquiries all the time, trust me, so start there for both industry and academic career information.
This can be done in a practical and productive manner without resorting to secretarial work or selling cars. What PM does takes a combination of skill, talent, and perserverance -- there are industries who both need and want him, and he won't have to compromise his artistry TOO much.
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Abortive scare tactics
[Read the article: Should I tell my daughter about her mother's two abortions?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]As one other respondant pointed out, this parent has not provided a reason for wanting to divulge the secret. Everyone assumes, myself included, that the father imagines the idea of abortion will function as a method of birth control... kind of like warning a small child that the boogie man will come and get him. Right?
Hmmm... I've got to say, the only way this works is if, well, there is universal agreement that abortion is bad. The boogie man is not welcome; he is a violent being intent on hurting you. Abortion has no intent and therefore cannot be violent. Abortion is a action one chooses, and while the choice may be one made for "right" or "wrong" reasons, the fact of abortion is impartial. Obviously, this father believes that there is something wrong with having an abortion and therefore believes the very thought of it will act as deterrent. Many women, and the mother of this teen may well be one of them, find abortion to be a relief and the only emotional pain associated with it comes from the stigma attached to it by everyone else.
I was certainly relieved. And, having been fortunate in my surgical experiences, I'd say I felt better after an abortion than while ingesting hormonal deterrents. My body definitely recovered better after an abortion than it did after I had my daughter, and I'm quite positive my life was much less at risk terminating a pregnancy than submitting myself to childbirth.
In the long run, oral contraceptives are certainly safer for the female body than repeated abortions. Any repeated surgery takes its toll, after all. Without imposing moral judgment on the choice, about all the father can really say is to quote medical fact and urge contraception. He can, as another respondant noted, explain that he himself was party to a choice, but this teenager -- in touch with her body and sexuality well enough to have come out of the closet and then changed teams, both stigmatized actions -- will most likely realize that her father cannot speak for the choice of another.
This father is most likely threatened by the sexual power wielded by his teenage daughter and wants to control it in the only way he knows how... by stigmatizing it. Intelligent enough to ask the question, perhaps with some self-examination this dad will realize the depth of his own moral dilemmas and offer some respect to the mother of his child, who went through a morally fraught experience with only his obviously limited emotional support.