Letters to the Editor
cim902
Published Letters: 70 Editor's Choice: 13
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If I were the wife.....
[Read the article: My boss wants me to apologize to his wife]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I would not want to hear from you. I might be curious about you, sure, and I might not be your biggest fan, but so long as you and my husband are not in contact, then he is the one I want to deal with. I can't see how hearing anything from you would help me solve my marital issues. As a matter of fact, when I would stop to think about it, I might actually feel a little bad for you, as my husband abused his position and is trying to blame you for his own lack of discretion. As I am not his wife, I feel really bad for you and urge you to "run away, run away!" Cary is exactly right.
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Nah.......
[Read the article: It's gift-giving time, and I'm cranky about gift cards and pushy kids]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I have to disagree with Cary some on this one. But before I do, let me admit that this year, we are giving our 28 nieces and nephews cash--because we are strapped, and $10 apiece is actually cheaper than the gifts we have previously been able to give.
BUT......
I think that the LW should just go ahead and give the family members whatever s/he feels like giving. Sure, our materialistic society is a mess--but why play into it? There is so much crap out there--and I count most videos, and cds and designer garbage among it--why support it, or enable others to do so? When our finances were less strained, I liked to give my nieces and nephews books, or games, or craft or art supplies or science kits that they might really enjoy or be inspired by, but that they might not have been exposed to. Some of them, I am sure, fell flat. Others, maybe not. But kids don't always know what's out there for them. We, as adults, do tend to know more, and we have developed better crap-detectors so, LW, feel free to exercise yours to the benefit of your family.
And if the child doesn't like the gift? Well, if s/he is over 12, s/he probably won't. That goes with the territory. Around that age, the magic of the holidays mysteriously vanishes and leaves one feeling confused, bereft, and petulant. It won't return until the teenager begins to realize that the holidays, for adults, are abotu giving, not getting. I have a vivid memory of being 13 and unwrapping a pair of hideous rainbow socks with toes (it was 1980) lovingly chosen for me by my grandma. I didn't want them--I didn't know what I wanted--probably to be 8, and to believe in Santa. But I knew she loved me, and I loved her, and I had to pretend to love those socks. So many times in life, we don't get what we want--but we have to be happy with it, and even grateful for it. So, LW, give your family those gifts that they don't know they want yet--and spend time listening to your nieces and nephews this holiday (Cary is right, there). It will mean the world to them.
Have a great holiday!
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This debate clinches it for me....
[Read the article: What you missed while watching "Chad Vader"]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I'm voting for McCain.
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Spark, schmark...
[Read the article: If the first date isn't great, why go out with him again? ]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I married rather late, at 33. During my single days, I think I dated at least 25 different guys, and took a 6 yr hiatus with one of them. My dating policy was this: go out with mst of the men who asked me, unless they were married, or involved, or seemed scary in some way. I also figured that I would give a guy at least 3 dates before I decided whether or not "we" had a future. Some guys just don't make good first dates. They might be nervous, or have had a bad day, or are not the most socially adept or "slick" people ever. By the third date, each of us had a pretty good idea of whether or not we were compatible, and the "relationship" just kind of faded away, no harm, no foul. As for the "spark"--I gradually learned that the "spark" means nothing as far as a long-term relationship goes. The man I eventually married 8 years ago (and now have 3 kids with) is not the man who most inflamed my passions, or for whom I had the strongest "connection," or had the most romantic feelings for. He is the man who has always been just who he appears to be. We share the same goals, the same basic values, and our approaches to life are complementary. He is not my "soul mate," but he is a wonderful partner. Our first date was fine, our second date was fun, the third date was fantastic. Be patient with yourself, and with the men you go out with. Don't load a first date with such high expectations. If you relax, I think you'll find your dates get much much better. Good luck out there!
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Hey, if I was married....
[Read the article: Heigl didn't love "Knocked Up"]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]to the husband character in "Knocked Up," I would have been a real shrew, too. He was a self-absorbed, moody jerk. And mushrooms in Vegas? Grow up! Neither of those guys was a prize.
Leah
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You know....
[Read the article: What would we see if we were behind your eyeballs, Cary?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I was very comforted by the fact that someone else has a draintrap that looks like mine does right now. If Cary would describe a filthy minivan and an overflowing laundry basket, it would just about make my day!