Letters to the Editor
molly picon
Published Letters: 60 Editor's Choice: 3
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memoreez
[Read the article: If Britney Spears shouldn't be naked in front of her kids, what about me?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Back in the late 70's, early 80's, my mom, a MILF if there ever was one, enjoyed sunbathing in the nude in our suburban backyard. She would take her Coppertone oil, rub it all over her breasts, and hold up a gigantic fold-out reflector so every inch of her could be perfectly browned and fried. Her polyester bikini top would lay unfolded over the deckchair arm, and thus she would doze away the hot summer afternoons.
I wouldn't even remember this, except that the neighborhood kids made fun of me over it. They watched her from the woods, I guess. I defended her, because I knew they were jealous because I had such a pretty mom.
The funny thing is, I can't remember my mom or dad being nude in the house, because it didn't make a deliberate impact on me. I only remember it through others. So it goes with people.
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name calling
[Read the article: Should I take my husband's name?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I didn't take my husband's name. Never occurred to me to. I like my name. Love it, in fact.
The other day (we've been married for three years) he brought it up. It started off as a complaint (his first wife didn't take his name, but she took her second husband's- hmm), and became about other things, like how I'm stubborn and don't do anything for him, blah blah blah.
I found it strange and ridiculous that he would bring it up at all. To me, it's such a non issue. It's too easy to retort. Would you change your name, I might ask. And why not? Okay. Then why would I? Why should I be subject to different laws?
Then, as improbably as it started, he complained that no one would ever have his name, that it would die out. I reminded him that my taking his name would not fix this problem. And then, quite genuinely, I reminded him that I had promised years ago that if I ever had his child the kid could get his name. I wouldn't be thrilled, but that's a tradition I don't know how to fight.
Marriage. What a paradise.
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this comic
[Read the article: WayLay]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Actually, this is an old one- I saw it in the LA Weekly a bunch of years ago. I love her work.
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dating without knowing
[Read the article: If the first date isn't great, why go out with him again? ]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I've never tried online or personals dating- I guess that means I've never really dated!- but I would be up for it if I was single just for fun. I think it would be hard to feel "sparks" on such a blind date, however, because a lot of what has made me feel sparks in the past is that tension of knowing/not knowing. Like, who is he? Does he like what I like, can he get me? Does he like me, do I like him? Without that chase and unknowingness, one can certainly wind up with a very suitable partner, but it will, I imagine, come about with more of a quiet simmer if not a spark of recognition of miraculously winding up in the right place at the right time.
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fallacies
[Read the article: Girl murdered over hijab?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I'm a Western woman, as per the anonymous posts, and a feminist.
There is a tendency to blame the religion, because there aren't enough counterexamples. Any bastard can kill his (or her) kid for whatever reason. In that sense, Broadsheet is correct. It is illogical to blame the hijab as the cause. When I hear that someone was killed for, say, a scant few dollars in their wallet, I find that fallacious. I know that a few dollars can be taken from a person without resorting to murder, so I can blame, oh, murderous tendencies, whatever. When it comes to Muslims, all we hear about are the extremes. Maybe this guy wouldn't have murdered his daughter if she had listened to him. I would question his judgment in taking his child to a Western country, then, but I would also not be against a punishment so grueling it would make death seem like a reprieve. Perhaps more stories about Muslims reprimanding their children in a more normal, non-murderous way would help. I assume this happens sometimes.
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other ways to look at the problem
[Read the article: I secretly hate myself]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I keep seeing this theme in the advice column. There are many ways to feel bad about yourself at a pity party. My parents were sweet, supportive and loved me very much, but they both had/have very low self-esteem and a high level of anxiety which I have inherited, though in a lesser form due to exerted effort. If you're a professional with a happy marriage they must have done some good for you. I don't say this to defend your parents, who sound like they lacked many essential skills, but to point out that very few people have perfect upbringings, and people who have children are usually not acting in deliberate collusion to inflict misery. I wonder if there is some other crisis acting upon you which makes you feel unhappy, and whether the feeling comes and goes (that, frankly, is normal, if unpleasant).
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I'm not crazy about Hillary...
[Read the article: Campaigning while female]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]...but she looks fine. It's not like she was photographed going out without her mascara and five hundred pounds of makeup.
It's almost as if people were being asked by the media to be idiots. I understand people being nervous about "secondary sexual characteristics" in a would-be president. But aren't wrinkles a sign of wisdom and experience? Or did I get the wrong memo at school?