Letters to the Editor
Tarsiana
Published Letters: 8
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Trim okay, scorched earth bad.
[Read the article: All the guys I'm dating want me to shave down there]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]It seems that everyone has a different experience; some find that no hair enhances sex, I found that it made it painful - really painful. I shaved once (for a bf) and was irritated, red and sore. Oh, and then the ingrowns. Nothing screams oral sex like zits on your crotch.
I have to wax (as my skin is just too sensitive for shaving), and I do the sides and trim with a pair of scissors (I'm Mediterranean too, so it can get a bit dense down there). That's it. Look, I don't think anyone has a right to demand something of a partner they're not *willing* to do themselves. Would you want to date a guy that demanded oral but never reciprocated? Hell no!
And it's not all men. I'm 27 and I've only had one boyfriend ask me to shave (we did it together). Perhaps you ought to consider some trimming...but so do men, and you ought to say so.
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be comfortable in your own skin
[Read the article: The 30-year-old virgins]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I dated a virgin (though I didn't know it until several months into our relationship, when he finally admitted it). It's silly to think that being a virgin at 30 automatically signals emotional and/or mental turmoil. Modern life can easily force to focus on other areas - work, school, family, health... Like any stereotype, it's easy to find people that fulfill it and who refute it.
I'm in my late twenties. While I'm not a virgin, there have been times when I have decided to not have sex for 6 months or a year so I can focus on something else - education, a second job, or just lacking the emotional energy for a relationship.
In the end, I never slept with my virgin boyfriend. He maintained his virginity as a way to keep distant, and given the emotional distance, I wouldn't have been willing to afford him the patience and guidance he would have needed. (That is, to my mind, his virginity was a manifestation of bigger issues, although to repeat, I don't think that's necessarily the case.) Depending on the sexual experiences of a virgin, it's possible, as with my old boyfriend, that there's a lot to be learned, and not everyone is willing to be a teacher. Find someone who is, who is wholly comfortable with their body and sexuality (and yours), who is not able to give more than receive (and not just sexually), and go at it.
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Attack of the typos!
[Read the article: The 30-year-old virgins]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Sheesh...never post while sleepy, I guess. I meant to say:
Find someone who is wholly comfortable with their body and sexuality (and yours), who is able to give more than receive (and not just sexually), and go at it.
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to a dear fellow human
[Read the article: Why won't my friends just shut up and let me die?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I wish you something better than luck. Something so great and wonderful it can only be expressed in a 20-letter German word or one kanji. (And I study the Romance languages, so I come up short.)
Your friends could be selfish; I don't know. But they may also love you and not now how to express it. Perhaps they are scared at the idea of losing you, of seeing death so close to themselves. Tell them their muddled way of talking to you isn't working; it's 'como agua para chocolate': they are doing their 'best' to be good friends while only making things worse.
But, unless you know for certain, don't presume cruelty when basic human ineptitude could be the cause. (And I hope you don't know for certain, because you deserve to be surrounded by people that love you.)
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You must be kidding!
[Read the article: My niece leased a Hummer!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]"Besides, are we going to save the planet by living quiet little energy-efficient lives? I don't think so, as monumental forces stand against us, and China, still an infant, lumbers into gargantuan destiny."
It is precisely by making these changes on the individual level that we will affect change on a larger level. The US is one of only two nations that refused to sign onto the Kyoto treaty, due mainly to those who claim a "controversy" about the veracity of the impact of CO2 on the enviroment, and those who prefer to not listen, thus doing nothing. Without momentum from the local level, there can be no improvement on a national, global level. Your choices most certainly do matter. It's defeatist to think otherwise.
A Hummer is a a gigantic middle finger. It lets all who see it know that the driver has a large amount of disposable income, and cares not for their impact on other drivers or the environment. It is not safer than a normal vehicle, it is not capable of off-road driving, it is not a vehicle for treacherous driving conditions. It is, I think, one of the purest representations of conspicuous consumption.
China, by the way, already has higher fuel economy standards than we do in the US, an the average American uses more resources than any other citizen of the world.
To the LW: or course you should say something. Be kind and be sincere. This is a deeply moral issue, and you ought to at least say your part. What your niece chooses do (not) do is then up to her.
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