It is completely immoral and unethical to fire a woman who has been beaten by her husband, but it's completely legal in most states. You can fire a woman who has to go to court to get a restraining order, also. Get your head on straight, woman! This isn't about your kid -- unless it's about your daughter. Do you want her to have no legal protections when her boyfriend (god forbid) beats her right before work?

The point about police not immediately alerting the campus -- because they thought this was a "domestic dispute" limited to the people involved or a murder suicide (and no, it wouldn't take long to realize there was no weapon) -- was that there was an armed MURDERER on the loose.

That's information I would have wanted to have, personally.

Their judgment about whether or not it was "domestic" or a "crime of passion" should not have prevented them from alerting students that two people had been shot dead on campus. Maybe some students might have decided to sit tight and not go to class. Most would have gone anyway but at least they would have known that they needed to be especially alert. Who knows? The point is that they should have been told, even if that is all the university could have done for them.

A simple announcement to the effect that there was an armed and dangerous individual, possibly still on campus, sent immediately, could have saved lives. It doesn't matter if the campus is large, or the security force is limited. Students and teachers should have had that information, they would have been extremely alert to any thing suspicious, and it could have made a difference.

Wouldn't you have been more careful that morning? Wouldn't you perhaps have heard the first shot and sprung into action? Instead people had to figure out what that noise was, and then decide if they were over-reacting, or if they would look foolish to run while there was still time, etc., etc.

I'm not saying that the administration is to blame for this awful act, or that it could have been prevented. I'm saying that some cops drew a conclusion about a "domestic dispute" and based on that information the administration decided to alert the campus much later than they should have. It doesn't mean I'm trying to appropriate this tragedy for the feminist cause.

We need a better name for the crime in which a woman is brutalized by her significant other. It's sickening the way people say the police assumed that this shooting was "just a domestic dispute" or "a simple domestic dispute". A domestic dispute more aptly describes a tiff about who is going to do the dishes or who is going to read to the kids tonight; it's not a description befitting an awful and horrific social ill.

Maybe it's just me, but this term is really beginning to grate; it not only grossly minimizes a huge problem, it's a misnomer. What is "domestic" about murdering one's girlfriend in a dorm room? It's like some kind of sick code for a third rate crime ("Well I guess if it was her boyfriend/husband who killed her, then it's not something we need to be concerned with.")

Enough is enough. Let's just call it murder, okay? As in, "a gunman murdered two people on campus, and therefore we can't assume that anyone is safe until he is caught or has had time to cool down. Please find a secure area and stay there." Instead we got some line about a "domestic dispute", and now 33 people are dead.

"Well, honey, I met him on the internet."

"And how did you know he was the right one for you?"

"Well, I posted a letter on the internet and got feedback from many, many strangers who helped me decide. I knew that some of them would insult me and malign me, but I knew it would be worth it. And now we have you!"

"And Mommy, why is my name Joe?"

hahaha

gotta love the 21st century

It's not your fault you got pregnant. That happens, and just because you had an affair and are a woman and are pregnant doesn't mean people should call you names and say terrible things about you.

You are about to have a baby and you have to get your head in the right place. You will want to bond with this child because in the end it may be just the two of you in this world together. That would be okay. It really would. Whatever you decide you have to get yourself together. You need to feel safe right now because you have to deliver this baby.

How about saying, tomorrow, "Honey, I love you, but I'm not sure this baby is yours. I'm sorry. I want you to raise this child with me, and no one ever has to know this but us. I love you. I'm sorry." Then you have your baby.

Or, you can do what women since the beginning of time have done, especially when they don't have the means to support a child alone, and keep your mouth shut. If you would feel alone with your secret think about all the women who have done this before. Is it better to be honest, or is it better for your baby to have health insurance and a college fund?

It's a really hard decision, but listen to me: you are not a bad person. You are a woman who got pregnant, accidentally. You are not the first and you won't be the last. Good luck to you and don't forget to let yourself feel joy and celebration. You will not get this precious newborn-time back.

Things will work out.