Um, did anyone notice that the main woman discussed in the article tried to leave three times? Batterers, regardless of their sex, are seriously ill. They will hunt you down, and sometimes they will kill you.

Also, have any of you ever met a sociopath? They are extremely successful manipulators.

My sister is a serial "battered woman," and while I find it frustrating that she seems completely unable to make good character judgments and good choices, once she does manage to try to get rid of one of her little friends, there are always all kinds of legal protections that make it really, really hard. She has served eviction papers on the current friend. First of all, that is really scary, because last time she kicked him out and changed the locks, he broke down a door with an ax to get back in. She has to wait 60 days for the eviction to go through. Meanwhile, he is stealing electronics from her children for drug money (the police claim they can't help her, since everything in the house is "common property") and abusing her and the kids. Her perspective? She wants to "maintain as much normality as possible" until the 60 days are up.

It may sound crazy to you, but it's a complicated situation. And it isn't yours. Real life is messy. There are a lot of broken people out there.

While many women who "get themselves into" such situations do not show good judgment when they do so, this fact surely does not excuse beating, stalking and murder.

This is not "two great tastes that taste great together." This is oil and water. And I think the VP needs to bring in a big swing state, preferably Ohio.

Is it just a girl thing? Anyway, putting Hillary's beloved voice in that helmet made it far, far more gruesome for me. I am not amused. Except the "James Carville's better-looking cousin" thing was hilarious.

Have you seen the Hillary-as-Vader movie? Now THAT is hilarious, without any loss of limbs.

The REALLY important thing about this thread? W.E.S. voted for Obama! What a pill.

True enough. I am a materialist too. And furthermore, I don't think words are nearly as important as money. But they are not irrelevant either. Contracts - the basis of our economic structure - are made of words too.

I don't think we disagree here, metasailor. But in some cases there is more of a relationship between words and reality than many would like to think. Because individual votes are meaningless, the process of electoral politics occurs through the building of coalitions. Coalitions are built through the framing of a narrative that will be accepted by large groups of people.

For what it is worth, I am supporting Obama because I believe he pretty effectively presents himself as beyond that model; he refuses to play the typical race and gender word and image games. But this thread is not about him.

Believe me. It's pretty bad. It's not just noise, it's vibrations through the whole house, and it sounds like it's relentless - not just random and passing like loud music. Don't minimize this.

LW, it is sad that you did not get to know your neighbor before and now you have to do it in order to address a conflict. Perhaps you can just get to know them first. Start a neighborhood association? Host a block party? I don't know, but I think if your relationship changes, the basketball will seem less annoying. And you will also be in a position to address it in a way that is not hostile. Solve the big problem first.

"b) discussing word usage ****does not substantively change the culture**** that uses those words, in any way. Any more than changing the car's color changes the car."

Well, you are begging a really big question there. In my opinion, the names we use actually shape the way we think about them in some ways. We could fight about that for years and still not be done - thousands of English majors, linguists, cognitive scientists and women's studies majors have been making a living off this discussion for a while - so I'm not sure it's so easy to brush aside like that.

It sounds like you are joking, but my niece (same age, same offense) was actually brought up on juvenile charges for the very same thing. She sent pictures of herself to her boyfriend via cell phone. She is doing a year of community service.

I think this boy should be punished (NOT the girl), but 16 years? Sex offender? Child porn? No. He is guilty of being young and stupid.

Actually, Republicans have always been free to cry, because they are not pre-feminized by being bleeding-heart liberals. Another example of how misogyny affects men as much as women. Metasailor, it is in your interest to be a feminist. (Not that you aren't, just because we disagree on a few superficial points, but I do think you have been remarkably resistant to certain feminists' points of view.)

Feminism is not just about women getting more goodies; it is about identifying, critiquing and hopefully ending what is now a very dated-sounded concept called patriarchy - the feminization and marginalization of others as a means to achieve control and power.

We have seen a great deal of open, unabashed sexism in this race so far, but there will be more. As Clinton leaves the race, they will start going more heavily against both of the Obamas as well as pretty-boy Edwards. Good thing they are so predictable, no?

"Got specific incidents of a man candidate crying in public on the campaign trail, in some way that does not reference his macho nature, and then not being completely finished?"

http://www.boston.com/news/nation/articles/2007/12/19/candidate_has_another_teary_moment/

It wasn't instant death. Not even a big deal. Being Mormon was the big deal.