Thank you Ms. Lay. I relate.

As for WaylayLay, why are you so full of bile? If you don't like her work, don't read it. There's room enough in the world for all kinds of expression. (Even yours, unfortunately.)

Is this contract some form of charity or community service on the part of salon? Why is this person allowed to treat the reading public like free therapy? It's like reading the last panels of For Better For Worse without the setup. You know, the panel where the character stares blankly out into space with the weight of the world on their shoulders. Barf out; gag me with a spoon.

That's all.

just because you are not constantly weeping over your brother's grave does not mean that you no longer love him....

my mother passed away in 1982 from complications relating to various forms of cancer; my youngest brother took his own life in 1987; my father passed away in 1997;

I miss them, I miss hearing their thoughts on current events, I miss having their help on things, I miss the sense of family

do I still grieve over their graves? No; do I occasionally shed a tear in private when I think of them? Yes

it is not that 'Time Heals All Wounds', rather it is that the passage of time softens the pain so that you continue with your life

and in just a little while, for those of us in our 50's and 60's, in only 20 to 30 more years, we will also depart from this life, to rejoin our family members in the Great HereAfter

do not despair, be patient, you will eventually see your brother again

Your brother was very lucky to have such a considerate sister.

The important thing is that you can't be hard on yourself and act as if there's "one way" you're supposed to react to a given event. You are not anyone else, and it's OK to just be yourself as you react to a given event. For a sad event such as death, there's nothing wrong with anyone who does not conform precisely to whatever one thinks society's "norm" is. We each react in our own way.

For a supposedly happy event, say New Year's Eve or a birthday, it's also fine to not have to paste on a smile just because one thinks it's expected behavior.

Besides, we who enjoy your work WANT you to be who you are and express yourself "as is." Keep these good comics coming Carol, they are thought provoking and so worthy of our time and interest!

All the best, g

I don't think about the anniversary of her death much...but I do remember her more when it's time to buy her a birthday present.

It's been four years. She would have been so proud to see Obama as our President. Like any sane person, she hated George W. Bush...but she died unexpectedly in August, and didn't live to cast a vote in 2004.

That last panel, Carol...that's all I can say to her, too. Beautiful. Thank you.

but the pain does subside. My dad passed away when I was 19. It took 2 years for the grieving to start and now 23 years later the missing is there but it's not the same as the fresh loss.

Just like you wrote for Christmas, your brother wouldn't want you to suffer for him forever. It's also not the natural way of things.

My sister died 18 years ago last December. Sometimes her anniversary or birthday leaves me sad and other times it passes by unnoticed. I don't think it makes me a bad brother, because she is never far away from my thoughts. Last month I came across a journal that I kept after her death. As I read the entries, I was reminded of the pain and confusion that my family and I went through after her death. One of my biggest fears was that I would forget her over time. Looking back, my memories of my sister are as strong as ever. It's just the pain that's diminished with time.

Maybe you think, Ms. Lay, that this post will disappear into the void of the Internet, like sands in the hourglass, like the days of our lives. Not in my head, they won't.

You are indeed fortunate, to memorialize your brother in this way. Things like this are the purpose of talent, beyond simple beauty, and you are fortunate to have had such a wonderful brother and to be able to commemorate him so beautifully.

"Your" was totally correct in those instances and I don't know why I tried to post a correction.

I'm taking Chem 110 and I just had a test tonight and my brain is a little fried, unfortunately. Sorry about that. I wish I was more adept.

that's all

You made a comic around Christmas that communicated how it helped you to think about how your brother would want you to enjoy the holiday. I lost my sister this summer, so reading that around Christmas was so nice, I can't even tell you. Her birthday is coming this month, and it will be the first birthday that she's not with us, and I don't know how I'm going to handle it. Probably not well.

I just want to thank you so much for doing your thing. I love comics so much. I've always admired your work, but I've loved your more personal stuff more than anything, even before my sister got sick. Thank you for sharing, and I'm sorry to be so cheesy.