At least, it sure sounds like he's a narcissist. Look up narcissistic personality disorder on the web and see if anything sounds familiar. Unfortunately, the odds are that 'kick him to the curb' (as another writer here suggested) is sound advice. Good luck.

Serioiusly, he's a hypocrite. Add one to your 'number' and find someone who's not a jackass.

Having re-read the original letter, I'm afraid I have to agree with Gina S. God forbid that poor man should ever develop health problems later in life. Perhaps it would be a blessing in disguise, he'd soon be rid of the wife and could get another dog. But for the time being might I add to other people's suggestions: try a product called Nature's Miracle (an enzymatic anti-odor agent) and perhaps get an air filter with activated carbon for the wife's new apartment.

Seriously, though, I have a few friends whose mates seem to be notably lacking in compassion; whenever I talk to one of them it makes me glad I'm single and living with my unfailingly affectionate and occasionally stinky pets.

I love your family! Where do I sign up? Can I bring my mom? She's a liberal Birkenstock-wearing retired Naval officer with Catholic sentimonies. I plan to follow in your dad's footsteps in 25 years or so....

Sounds like good clean fun.

Best of luck with the boxing day hangovers!

When the bathroom's done, take 6 months or so off, and get HEPA air filters for the rooms the husband hangs out in. Give yourself breathing room, literally and figuratively. Go to the movies or whatever. When you're actually working on it, reward yourself in some inexpensive way each time you finish a project. And, maybe the husband should talk to a counsellor about why he might be depressed. Is it just the house?

Apparently there's ANOTHER SB posting here, evidently from Canada; with a few things to say abot the 2nd Indochina war....

Maybe I'm forgetting a few things here, so if anyone wishes to correct me please do so; but as I recall the United States has a long history of involvement, or lack thereof, with Vietnam and thus plenty of culpability.

A few notable points:

After the end of WWI, at the Paris Peace Conference, a young Ho Chi Minh (then Nguyen Ai Quoc) presented an 8 point plan for Vietnamese self determination and sought help from Woodrow Wilson in obtaining his country's freedom from French rule... Wilson refused to see him. Naturally his anti-imperialist views and rejection by the imperial powers of the day led him to join the French Socialist party...

During WWII, Vietnam was occupied by and fiercly resisted Imperial Japan. Whether one looks at Vietnam as a French colony or a nation in its own right, Vietnam was clearly on the side of the allies. Yet at the end of the war the US handed Vietnam back to France, claims of US netrality in the matter notwithstanding. (France, her armies decimated, resorted in some instances to re-arming defeated Japanese troops to reestablish colonial rule)

Fast forward a few years to Dien Bien Phu - the Vietnamese have defeated France fair and square with help from China. China was not necessarily a traditional ally of Vietnam, having invadaed her a number of times over the centuries, but the US had steadfastly come down on the side of the colonial oppressors rather than the freedom fighters so the Vietnamese didn't have much choice when it came to allies. In any case, having beaten the French in spite of massive help from the US, Vietnam was promised free and fair elections in two years' time. One guess as to which superpower torpedoed those elections because it didn't like the candidate who would inevitably win. (Ho was, of course, definitely a Communist by this time)

While it is true that Americans started becoming more directly responsible for deaths in Vietnam only in the 1960's, it is disingenuous at best to deny US involvement in years of conflict in the region.

Anyway, corections welcome, this is just My Two Cents.

thanks.

Where's Cary today? Who's the stuck up rich dude who's taken his place?

Clearly nouveau riche, the properly rich don't tolerate the help stealing from houseguests.

Anyway - Letterwriter, your boyfriend should (sadly) dump you, it's the only way to get away from such possible future in laws. Your father, should he choose to be indignant about something, might consider insisting that his friend fire the maid(s) rather than dumping on your boyfriend. His friend should probably go easier on the maid than that, but he does need to deal with the situation. He absolutely did the right thing in repaying the poor young photographer. Absolutely. I completely agree with those who've said they would be mortified that a guest in their house had been robbed by a member of the household. And completely aside from the fact that he couldn't afford to lose $1000, your boyfriend did the right thing in accepting it, assuming he did so graciously. If you want to please your father, obviously you need to get a boyfriend of more distinguished breeding (that is, richer). Your father is a rich jackass, apparently, and you should do him the favor of telling him so.

How do you ineptly calculate 36 divided by 11430? Can you do a little more to encourage the idea that girls/women are bad at math? Criminy....