He and this on line woman are covering for each other?

Your obsession is protecting you from facing the awful truth. He is protecting her, not you.

I don't think your marriage is salvageable, given his value system and his commitment to protecting her identity.

Cut to the chase. Get some counseling for your own self esteem and leave the bum.

No one picked up on your statement "I lost a very close friend recently" and this could be a big source of your problem.

Clearly with the load you and your spouse are both carrying, there is not room for anything to go wrong. But something DID go wrong -- you lost a close friend.

All the suggestions here are excellent. But it is also a fact that sometimes the best we can do with our life right now is to just take one step at a time. Try to do some things that are good for your body and also try to get some extra rest.

Good luck.

I know that AA has only a 5% success rate but this fellow has stuck with it for 80+ days so he has a shot at becoming a member of this small group.

7 meetings a week should be enough at least some weeks and assuming his share of child care and giving his wife a break is necessary. Newly sober folk are often not the easiest folks to live with.

This sponsor is doing the right thing to not play into this fellow's ego habits.

Time will tell whether the marriage lasts, whether he needs a non-drinking partner etc. His wife may be a 'saint' for staying with him or she may have a drinking problem herself and now finds the relationship very difficult. We cannot know from the information provided.

However, he would do well to work on a positive relationship with his kids, that's for certain and his sponsor is encouraging this without getting entangled in a discussion as to why etc.

Hang in there and congratulations on your sobriety so far!

I think that some of the hitting bottom stories that are told in AA are exaggerations by folks who are as addicted to drama as they are to booze.

The advice to find some other, healthier high is excellent.

Doing it for your children is a good reason but doing it for yourself, because you want a meaningful, fulfilling life is an even better reason.

I would think that a Presidential pardon would only be valid in the US.

There some Europeans who want to see US officials held liable for violating the Geneva convention. I don't know if there is sufficient outrage but, if they are serious, then a US investigation may provide evidence for such an action.

It is about wanting perfection instead of reality. Your lives sound exhausting.

If you cannot drop the selfish drama and actually have FUN together - and have fun with your child - then give up. Life is too short.

No marriage is perfect and no amount of work will make it perfect. However, when we are able to genuinely enjoy things together and genuinely enjoy seeing our partner happy, those times nurture us and give us the strength to get through tougher times.

Because of the joy, it is easier for each person to avoid exercising their worst faults - most of the time anyway. There will likely always be times when our partner does that one thing that just makes us boil. I don't think there's any getting away from that. And endless analysis, endless 'work' just makes it worse, IMHO.

Firing Monehan was legal - she had the authority to do that.

However, whether she fired him or not, it was NOT legal for her to use the powers of her office to try to get her brother-in-law fired.

She should have thought of this before she fired Monehan, LOL. Stupid. Stupid. But then, with her lack of ethics, it's a good thing that she is dumb as well.

I'm Canadian and everyone I know - liberal or conservative - hopes that Obama gets elected - for the good of the US and the rest of the world.

So I hope that all of you folks make sure that all Obama supports get out to vote!!

Both parties have some pretty ugly roots.

And both have taken some inspiring stances in the past.

McCain/Palin's positions say more about the neocon hijacking of the GOP than they do about its roots.

What a farce!

So called warrior McCain sends the princess out to battle!

The dumbing down is deliberate, you have to hope that common sense eventually triumphs. The neo-cons need a charismatic, religious, dumb leader - someone they can control - like dubya.

They believe in using religion as a means of social control. They certainly don't believe it themselves. I think that they would like McCain to die in office as they would then have their controllable dumb leader again.

McCain is more moderate but he had to go along because, like Bush, he needs the religious right to get elected.

Fortunately, I think that the traditional conservatives are catching on to the game these guys are playing. Plus, common sense folks who don't give two hoots about idelogy want someone who will fix the economy and give them back some pride in their country.

Palin is just a pawn in all of this. I think that she really believes that she is being used by God for a higher purpose. Wouldn't it be nice to think that she IS being used -- used to help prevent the neo-con Republicans from getting back in? Sigh.

I'm kind of centrist myself and so have very little against moderate conservatives. But these neo-con fanatics are really scary!!