Letters to the Editor

• The monotony of the modern wedding

  [Read the article: The marriage industrial complex]
  [Read more letters about this article: Here]

  It's one thing to spend lots of money on a truly memorable affair, but what I find depressing about the wedding industry of late is their seeming ability to separate people from gobs of their money and in return give them the most strikingly unremarkable result, the details of which no one but the couple themselves and perhaps the couple's immediate family will remember. What a waste!

  Brides spend hundreds or thousands of dollars to look as much like every other bride as possible. With few exceptions the brides that I've encounterd in the past five to ten yars have run together in one giant blur of strapless ivory dresses with full skirts. A little bit of beading running across the bodice of one dress is not going to distinguish it from every other nearly identical dress, yet these are the sorts of notions that otherwise sensible women fall prey to. And for the amount that a woman spends on even a relatively cheap / non-descript looking wedding dress, she could buy a very nice non-wedding dress, look beautiful, and actually separate herself from the hordes of bridal clones.

  Then there are those favors that, if people even remember to take them home, will end up shoved in a junk drawer until the next spring cleaning episode when they finally get tossed.

  There's the tedious multi-course, sit-down meal that has considerably less flavor than would, say, a slice of homemade lasagna or some barbeque. (But at least it looks fancy!)

  The poor bridesmaids, almost certainly too old to be dressed as a matching set (as anyone who has reached the double digits is).

  The polite smiles as guests sit awkwardly watching the couple sway to the strains of "At Last."

  The grim patience of the single women who must endure yet another embarrassing bouquet toss.

  The familiar reception soundtrack, filled with songs that no one would willingly listen to in their spare time.

  For this, tens of thousands of dollars are spent! And what will the guests remember? They'll remember catching up with this friend or that relative they haven't seen in a few years. They'll remember any delightfully un-choreographed moments that manage to slip through the otherwise rote performance of procession, vows, introductions, first dance, toasts, bouquet toss, Electric Slide, and cake cutting. They won't remember the centerpieces and flower arrangements, the color scheme, the bridesmaids' matching pedicures and updos, the flavorless food, the dry cake.

  So maybe they're promoting reverse snobbery, but the folks having pot-luck weddings in their backyard have a point, if for no other reason than that these weddings almost certainly have more of a personal touch to them, and will consequently be more memorable, than the average $25,000 affair that looks like it was produced in a warehouse. And being able to do it without sacrificing one's savings or going into debt seems like a lovely thing.

  Permalink Monday, May 21, 2007 11:59 AM