I've got your point :) I've got to work on that crabby tone in the writing (how do I always do that?). I just know so many women who have turned into alcoholics or been raped at campus parties or been so traumatized by the whole "scene" that they dropped out of college. I'm not going to go all concern troll here--I just wish to acknowledge the role of self respect in making these "liberated" choices, and wish the author of the article would, too. And sometimes the most liberated choice is passing up some guys. Actually a lot of guys. I can't think of any guy I've ever regretted NOT having sex with, once I got to know him better (yikes!).

And I think Mindyhih has got it, including her last sentence. Red star for her post!

not mindyhih, I mean.

correctly notes the role of low self-esteem in promiscuous behavior, something I wish the so-called "sex positive" posters would at least acknowledge....

I guess that's too much to ask.

always has something intelligent to say about contemporary American life. Love her work in the New Yorker, started reading her pieces over ten years ago. I would strongly recommend her books to anyone!

in Saudi Arabia and Pakistan girls have big, big weddings. Dream weddings. Sometimes thousands of people, if the family is at all important. The bride is encrusted with jewels and everyone waits on her hand and foot. She often spends a week getting her personal grooming done. She gets many glittering gifts. Even a small Pakistani wedding would put any American wedding to total shame, and the bride's family often goes into heavy debt, even if no dowry is exchanging hands.

Yes, the bride in Saudi Arabia and Pakistan is truly queen for a day.

One day.

We all know what she is for the rest of her life (cough *slave* cough).

Parallels?

I think there are.

I bet most of these raging Bridezillas in America are probably huge social conservatives from families of strict neocons. it's just a hunch.

The wife in the joke is on vacation in Turkey, and hopes the Turkish police will hand over a replica of the soap opera star. Arabs tend to look up to Turks for their light skin. The joke sounds a little bit racist to me (the soap opera hunk looks like a handsome Turk, better than an Arab).

I'm sure there's many layers here we don't entirely get. Maybe we shouldn't pass judgement?

Or we could just send the Arab ladies TCF's latest feature article. That should set them straight.

Go ahead Berke, just say it.

So much fuss about so little. Didn't any of you really get it?

Having sex every night with guys who don't give a shit about you, for whom you must be a "sweet lil' thing" to reinforce their sexist stereotypes, and who are going to toss you out in the morning if not earlier, must really, really suck. To have to grub and bow and scrape for the approval of misogynist shits who are using you as a screw toy must really, really suck.

It's that simple.

Any truly intelligent woman should be able to find a way to make a lucrative living while remaining psychologically whole and physically safe, if the money is really all that important.

If not, well sisters, becoming cum rags for rich SOBS isn't going to be an empowering experience for you (and isn't, long term, going to make you rich), no matter what the pink-clad Barbie clone Happy Whore says on her TV show.

call girls are not doing other women any favors by sucking up to said sexist stereotypes. They certainly cannot be called feminists of any description. They are making the lives of other women very much more difficult by playing up to the "very sweet, very submissive" ideal of womanhood.

this will run to 400 posts from whining fat ugly men sitting behind computers (and one poster lying about how "she" is a woman and a sex worker, although the same username comes on other threads referring to self as a male...and let's not forget the enlightened guy with the green card bride 30 years his junior who cooks okay, but doesn't clean enough), talking about how wonderful prostitution is, how delightful, and how oh boy, it should be legalized, it's nothing more than a free market transaction between mutually consenting adults who have NO power disparities between them, oh no no no....never....it's JUST LIKE in this bubbly pink TV show (which was thoroughly trashed here on Salon by Salon's own Heather Havrilensky for being vapid, unctuous, and unrealistic)....

ready, set, go, boys....that is if your trembling, semen-encrusted hands can man your slippery-with-slobber keyboards. Have fun, kids, exercising that tiny little brain cell you share between you all. Don't drop it or it won't be any good any more...oh, wait....never mind.....

Ignore the Gonzo

Hear the Tortoise

and maybe leave town, too. It sounds like you want to.