Full disclosure: Author Beth Harpaz and I attended high school together. Honest truth: Thirteen is the New Eighteen is really, really funny. No lectures are given by the author, whose sometimes-mantra is I Am a Terrible Mother.

Don't fret -- laugh instead, and when you have finished the book you will believe that You Are Not a Terrible Mother, and that You Have Pretty Good Kids.

http://www.amazon.com/13-New-18-Me-While-Breakdown/dp/0307396428/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1256668616&sr=8-1

Full disclosure: Author Beth Harpaz and I attended high school together. Honest truth: Thirteen is the New Eighteen is really, really funny. No lectures are given by the author, whose sometimes-mantra is I Am a Terrible Mother.

Don't fret -- laugh instead, and when you have finished the book you will believe that You Are Not a Terrible Mother, and that You Have Pretty Good Kids.

http://www.amazon.com/13-New-18-Me-While-Breakdown/dp/0307396428/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1256668616&sr=8-1

I take it you're not entirely kidding. And in my opinion you are not entirely wrong.

I'm with you. Why reward a smart ass when people who actually would like to get Cary's thoughts on their problems are waiting?

No thanks necessary, Natty-J: it was absolutely worth my unpaid time to tell you in reasonably polite terms what your comments suggest to me about you. And of course bonus for me in that I get to share that view with others. Come to think of it, Natty-J, thank YOU!

Just curious, Natty-J: have you ever done the analysis on yourself: that is, have you ever calculated how many calories you take in and how many you burn? This will come as a major shock to you: many people just naturally burn more calories than others. It may or may not be obvious to you that the foregoing sentence contemplates two people, one thin and one fat, who engage in the same amount of physical activity on a daily basis and consume roughly the same number of calories on a daily basis.

I'm going to make another guess about you: you are effortlessly thin. Oh, I'll assume that you don't gorge yourself and that your are reasonably active, but I believe it is unlikely that you count each calorie, weigh each serving, wear a pedometer, and generally do all that is required to keep that calories-in-calories-out thing working optimally. Luck is on your side, Natty-J, and you aren't very gracious about it.

Edward Noodleburg is kidding, Natty-J. He's being ironic. Sardonic. And he's expressing disdain for the fantastic prejudice against fat people threading through so many of the posted comments, including yours.

We live in a consumer culture that targets those genetically predisposed to obesity: Processed food relatively cheap and plentiful and deadly; meanness from the non-obese that makes the rest of us struggle like crazy to lose weight only to gain it back again, and then some. I theorize that if every natural-born size 14 (and her male equivalent) were treated decently by society, that's the size they'd maintain. Instead, the dramatic weight losses and virtually inevitable weight-gains-plus land that one-time size 14 into a size 26.

The obese among us are not likely to look at a slender Surgeon Genral and think "gee, if s/he can do it, so can I!" On the other hand, with someone like Regina Benjamin as Surgeon General, we may well find ourselves encouraged by her advice to eat healthfully and to exercise, and maybe even to set a realistic goal of losing 10 per cent of body weight for better health.

I don't know you, Natty-J, but you don't come across as a particularly nice or sympathetic person. Edward Noodleburg, I appreciate your post, and your very well drawn analogy.

If I keep baiting you, will you keep biting?

Let's find out.

Tell me sugar cookie, have you anything further to spew in my general direction? Here's a suggested theme: share with us your bona fides as a film critic. Discuss.

Have a great holiday weekend biscuit baby.

Get a life, sweet thing.

And the name's Deborah. Is that too many syllables for you?

Well, GeeBee friend, for one thing I use my name and not whatever you call your dopey moniker. For another thing, I have as much right to criticize other people's criticisms as people have to make the initial criticisms -- i.e., I am as entitled to my opinion as you are to yours.

By the way, you must not do a whole lot of reading if you think I am capable of writing the most stupid sentence you ever read. I can point you to a whole bunch of others. You must have penned a few yourself.

Finally, I note that your nasty little missive skirts the issue, which is this: you, sir (or madam) are no Nia Vardalos. I admit to never having created anything as successful or culturally significant as "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." WTF have you created that anyone who doesn't read letters to Salon has ever heard of?

Why all this extreme hostility towards Nia Vardalos? I thought Zacharek was unnecessarily mean but some of the commenters actually take the cake. Maybe you folks (including Zacharek) should tone it down until you create something as successful, culturally and financialy, as "My Big Fat Greek Wedding."