Finally, a response that is helpful and to the point. That writing workshop is clearly helping, Cary.

To the LW, you say you are a vibrant, interesting and interested woman who does things on her own and has a fine life. So why do you think you need a man? I'm not saying men are completely unnecessary, but neither are they required for women to have fulfilling lives. You can do fine on your own, as you have been. By all means, date men - go out to dinner, to the movies, on vacation, have fun with them, etc. Hanging out with guys can definitely be pleasant, informative and fun.

But let go of the "romance" thing. It's always been a big lie anyway - that idea that there is One True Soulmate who will Make Your Life Complete. I agree with Cary on this one. Instead of looking for that pie in the sky, just enjoy the men you know here and now, and stop expecting anything from them as far as commitment goes. Perhaps you'll meet the Right Guy at some point, but actually expecting it every time you strike up a friendship with a man is just setting yourself up for disappointment, as you've already experienced.

Look at it this way: If you keep focusing on Catching A Man, you'll lose out on all the advantages, experiences and insight that all those other men would bring you. Perhaps that sounds cavalier, but it's true. Would you want only one friend in your life? Then why only one man? Once a person gets past the whole family thing, there's really no reason to obsess over getting into some lifelong relationship. Enjoy your independence, and if a mate happens along, one with the stick-to-it you require, hey great!

Also, I find it hard to believe that the older-man-who-wants-fertile-young-thing concept could possibly be a surprise to you. This is not some recent phenomenon, after all. It's been common for centuries. The only new thing about it is the ease of divorce turning it into a revolving door, as it used to be that the older man would remarry a young woman only when the first wife died. (An exception that proves the rule is Henry VIII, who tossed wives over his shoulder with rather alarming alacrity.)

Good luck! :)

You know, that video is WAY cool. Many thanks for posting the link.

Question, however: why isn't this on Video Dog? This is EXACTLY the sort of thing that should be posted there. I don't know what sort of force has locked the door to that column (some weird zombie guard with a death-ray gun, perhaps), but it seems that only a tiny trickle of rather tiresome stuff goes there. It's a rather silly situation when the writers in other sections have to post links to videos even when they're not relevant, and the actual VIDEO section is starving for lack of enteratining content.

Just sayin'.

Seriously, Joan, are you? You can't be serious about praising this bullying gasbag for pounding on another of his own kind. So one of them is one stripe of nutcase and the other isn't. So what? Does the fact that Donohue has found another target for his bloviating make you praise him? Or is it the whole pot-kettle aspect of the thing that turns you on?

This is just another of Donohue's embarrassingly transparent lunges at the Most Hypocritical Bigot championship title. That you find anything in it to smile on is, to say the least, amusing.

I do love a good dandelion break.

More businesses should take a tip from the utterly awesome Trader Joe's. Every customer who brings their own bags gets a ticket for a weekly raffle, the prize being $25 in groceries at the store. That is a really great incentive, and costs the store very little.

The only use I have for those plastic bags from the store is to line my garbage containers. When I run low, I ask for the bags on shopping trips. But since I'm single and recycle as much of my trash as I possibly can, I only need to ask for some every three or four months. One trip to the supermarket will do me well for quite a while.

Besides, there's something very cozy about bringing your own bags. It reminds me of shopping with my aunt during my childhood visits to Spain, when we would walk every morning to the market and return with her net bags filled with fresh food.

It seems one thing we won't lose is our position as inspiration to the rest of the world.

*sigh*

So glad I kept my After The Election t-shirt:

Don't blame me! I voted for Bill 'n' Opus!

Could we persuade you to run again, with Opus as your running mate? Maybe this time America would get sane and vote you into office. At least we know you wouldn't subject us to the crazy shit we've had to live through these last six years. I doubt you'd do worse than hack up a few hairballs on the Oval Office rug.