that our society is getting fed up with the ridiculous nuclear family set up that separates people from their roots and makes raising children a real hardship at times. Perhaps we're edging back towards the extended family model, where more than one generation live together. This is a model of family life that served humanity well for millenia, and only began to change once industrialization made it possible (and necessary) for families to split up to find work away from their point of origin.

Coming from a Spanish family myself, I've always been comfortable with the extended family. My siblings and I lived either with or near our parents for quite a while after reaching adulthood, until each of us found situations that allowed us to move away securely and without financial trouble. And each of us has come back and left again more than once, with no resentment or recriminations on anyone's part. On the contrary, my parents have always been happy to have us around, and perfectly willing to help out when we hit a rough spot.

If American culture, which purports to be "pro-family" yet insists on pressuring families to split up the minute adulthood begins, were more open to the idea of extended families, more accepting of models other than the rigid nuclear family, perhaps these situations wouldn't raise eyebrows. Perhaps the kids could be happy close to their folks, more willing to help out and be part of the family in a settled, contented manner.

Oh and the mother-daughter thing? What's to get all het up about? The happiest times I've had with my mom was when we were really in tune, discussing and sharing our deepest feelings and helping each other out in emotionally hard times. They beat the times when we were distant and formal by a LONG shot. Anyone who thinks there's something "weird" about that clearly has some very serious problems regarding their own parents, and I feel rather sorry for them.

Wow. Just wow. I would have given that doctor a piece of my mind, for certain. Who the hell is he to judge your family relationships? Like I said above, he must have some serious problems with his own parents. What a rude jerk!

this sort of question turns into blaming overweight on the person who is fat, or on genetics. Why is it that articles about this subject so rarely focus on the relentlessly bizarre pushmipullyu of society's conflicting messages about weight?

We make it far easier and cheaper to feed kids crap instead of real food, we develop technologies that make it inevitable that a large portion of our population learns to spend their lives sitting and staring instead of being physically active, and thus we basically guarantee that a large percentage of people end up overweight (and more all the time). Then we bombard our population with hysterically paranoid messages about how IT'S DEADLY TO BE FAT OMGWTF!!! The constant tension of these conflicting circumstances just turns out people who are fat but miserable. How in the hell is that supposed to help anything?

What we should be doing as a society is trying to find solid, concrete ways to make good tasty food available for everyone at prices they can afford, making physical activity more fun than being brainwashed by TV and video games, and for gods' sakes lightening up on those of us who are overweight. When we get to the point where we're calling "obese" anyone who is twenty-five pounds over the ridiculous "norms" we aspire to, things have gotten to an insane pass, and we're only making life harder and people more paranoid about their own bodies.

I was raised by parents who never made any issue about weight gain. My mother never judged any of us on that score, and my dad actually got angry whenever I said I thought I might be overweight. Why? Because I wasn't, and he hated the stupid American obsession with this subject. When I mentioned, at 13, that a teacher had made a comment to me (she was one of those beanpole skinny women who sneer at anyone that didn't look like her), he got furious, told me I was fine and beautiful, and threatened to go to the school and have it out with that woman. Only my begging him not to stopped him, but I was secretly warmed by his concern and protectiveness towards me. (But then, my folks aren't American, and I've often been very grateful for that fact. It's saved me from a lot of the strange problems that I've seen in other folks I know.)

So in my view, the problem has more to do with the climate surrounding this issue, and far less to do with the people themselves. People rise to the level of expectations, and we live in a society that expects physically inactivity, self-hatred and body paranoia, and in fact profits from it. Change the environment, and people will change with it. It may take a while, but it'll happen. Maybe then all these problems will seem quaint to our grandchildren.