I don't know who I'm upset at more. The jury and legal system, the mother, or the individuals who think this is acceptable.

This woman can not be permitted to retain custody of this girl. Child Protective Services should be removing her from the household any moment now. Regardless of whether or not the law identifies these behaviors as 'abuse,' it is clear that it is not a healthy environment for this girl.

Not to mention the fact that her mother solicited a piercer to perform an illegal act by piercing the genitals of a minor. I'm not typically an alarmist, but I really really want to hear from anyone who thinks this situation is acceptable. I want someone to make it make sense to me.

Who am I to judge? Obsession is a tough word to riddle out. There are so many aspects of Obsession that we really don't know what to make of it.

LW's letter can go either way. I think overall Cary has taken the right tack, but I wonder how it is for her. LW, do you feel harmed by your 'addiction?' Are you writing because you feel this is damaging you? Or are you writing because you feel that the world will disapprove of your 'addiction?'

I've just reread the letter. LW, you seem to be doing fine. You say you '...should be too busy...' Who decides that you are too busy to write to Cary? Who decides that you don't have time to spend on FanFic?

The true measure of the health of an action is "Does this behavior prevent me from fulfilling the responsibilities of my life, or from interacting healthily with my environment?" And only you can answer that. You can answer it by looking to clues around you.

While I don't often go in for FanFic, I know what it is like to be absorbed and obsessed. When I begin to read a book that takes my attention I find it virtually impossible to stop reading it. I will read it at work, in lieu of work. (Fortunately my employment is flexible and I can get away with this.) I will stop for dinner on the way home to read it, instead of going straight home. I will go to bed early and read, and stay up later than I need to to read it. Sometimes I have to say, "I need to put this book down and do X." And then I put the book down.

For me, the obsession is great, but it isn't harmful. I acknowledge that I'm obsessed because my mind and body need the release of indulging in this story. I know that I am more likely to get book-obsessed if I'm over-stressed, or over-worked. I also know that indulging healthily in that obsession allows me to process it thoroughly and move into a more balanced place.

It sounds to me like you are using fiction for one of it's primary purposes. Escape. There is nothing wrong with your focus on these characters. They give you the escape, the fantasy that you need in your life, and that is not a bad thing. Give yourself the time you can spare, make yourself a promise to take care of your responsibilities, and a promise to spend time on yourself.

To address your anger at not finding the stories you want, need I suggest you write the FanFic that you want to see? Best of luck and love. You are doing just fine.