just like the law distinguishes between murder and manslaughter

• These distinctions already exist: first, second or third degree rape, sexual abuse, criminal sex acts

But how about choosing to consume alcohol to the point that you might give consent without intending to?

• That's "regrettable sex" unless it's an extreme situation--substances were consumed to the point that no reasonable person (as a standard of law) would consider it true consent--eg., someone slurs "y-" while passing out in a pool of one's own vomit.

Stumbling with a guy back to his dorm room and engaging in everything leading up to sex only to quietly murmur "no" when he's already on top of you?

• Did the guy hear the word no? If he did and continued anyway, it's a degree of rape.

Being so drunk that you're not exactly sure what happened?

• If there's no physical evidence, no witnesses and no recall of the event, you can't charge someone with a crime no matter what sense you may have that something bad happened.

I think the "chant" of "rape is rape is rape" reflects a clearer reality than many people think exists. When you call rape what it is--penetration when consent never existed or no longer exists--it's really that clear. It only seems unclear because, as a point of law, accused rapists don't have to demonstrate they acted with consent, and that, rather alleged victims have to prove they denied consent verbally, physically and sometimes even through demeanor.

washpublicdefender re: "A burglary or trespass victim must prove they didn't give consent for the accused to be in their home. Of course, proof can be as simple as the alleged victim saying, 'No, he did not have my permission to take my car.'"

• That a say-so is sufficient is what makes burglary and trespass prosecution so different from rape prosecution.

On the issue of the Jane Doe rape kits, it sounds like a good idea to me. All it really does is preserve the evidence--whatever it is--in the event the woman decides to file charges.

Exactly. Spot on.

Thank you for these gems:

"Have a little faith in your own culture and language. If the product is good the market will buy it." and "As such we eat sweet and sour pizza, but no one is speaking Mandarin."

I don't agree with all of Cocco's interpretations, but there's one thing that's absolutely true:

There are many reasons Clinton is losing the nomination contest, some having to do with her strategic mistakes, others with the groundswell for "change." But for all Clinton's political blemishes, the darker stain that has been exposed is the hatred of women that is accepted as a part of our culture.

sagcat makes an interesting point about failures in "insult imagination." I think it's also important to think about how we insult people. Why are there so many woman-based insults such as bitch, whore, etc.? That goes right back to Cocco's point about hatred of woman as an accepted cultural undercurrent.

And, one more time, this article did not say Clinton is losing because she's a woman.

jello5929: Misogyny means "hatred of women." Perhaps you mean sexism or misandry (hatred of men)?

melthough: You're not the only one who read the article (just one of few among the posters, apparently). And I, too, found the nutcracker hilarious. Hillary-arious, even. Sorry, I have a weakness for bad puns.

At this point, maybe it'd be simpler to ask who on Team McCain isn't a lobbyist.

A lot of these comments prove Cocco's thesis.

Amity, you beat me to it with, "One half of the baby industry saturates our culture with confusing messages, and the other half steps in to help you sort through them." Plus a quote from the great thinker Marx? Bravo!

Are baby planners any more ridiculous than hiring a cook or a cleaning person? Someone to do the things you could do yourself but you don't want to do due to lack of time, interest or skill? And if you really wanna roll with this, how many of us sew our own clothes or grow our own crops?

Anyway, at least hiring a baby planner could be more valuable than hiring a wedding planner. The baby planner helps you get the appropriate baby safety devices, find a nanny and a doula. A wedding planner helps you plan a few hours out of one special day.

I'm sure you didn't intend it, but you have no idea how offensive that comment is to women without mothers.