In WW II, we bombed like crazy. Killing German and Japanese grandmas and little kids was okay. It was patriotic. In the 1960s and 1970s, killing Vietnamese grandmas and little kids was okay. John McCain himself killed many Vietnamese grannies and kids.

Now, 2007, we must give the US Air Force a certain amount of credit. They are trying to limit their grannie-kill. But the only reason they do it is that we are watching.

Otherwise, they might nuke the whole Iraqi and Afghan populations, for their own good. You can't trust these foreigners, so you mght as well kill them.

Please keep watching!

Do you remember that god-awful story, early on in Afghanistan, when American Air Force guys machine-gunned an Afghan wedding? And they killed the bride and her dad, plus most of the dear little-kid cousins on the wedding dance floor?

Hail W. Bush! Hail Mighty Conqueror!

And you must have spent a lot of Bin Franklin's on your trip. Did you bump into King Kaufman heading the other way at the same time?

Welcome back! (I believe the correct spelling is Bin Log-In.)

Welcome back!

One of the best singers I ever played with told me how to get rid of a song in your head:

Imagine yourself onstage in front of a big audience, with a full orchestra. And belt out the whole song, all verses, from start to finish.

Include a great big show-biz finish, and imagine applause and cheers washing over you. Bow; smile; wave; say, "Thanks! I love you all!" And then imagine the curtain coming down. Leave the stage.

The big finish will finish that song in your mind. You will stop singing it to yourself. That is how the pros do it. It works for me. Try it.

Americans over (maybe) age forty remember when video porn was grainy black-and-white film involving ugly guys wearing black socks and fat ladies from some farm somewhere.

My bachelor pal pointed out a free porn web site to me a couple years ago. It definitely is NOT like the old days. Now, they have many really attractive young women doing it like crazy!

The point is: Porn no longer is just obvious losers doing embarrassed stunts. I have not seen the defecation Secretary Gonzales speaks of, and I have not seen any child porn...

But it is a revelation to see pretty young women doing it. I will NOT give you the website address, because you will want to look at it too often. But, Americans, please be aware. It is not a good situation. And it is not at all like what you grew up with. It is much worse.

Carey (Genius) saw that this problem has two separate problems:

1. Racism, and,

2. Songs running through your head.

So.... Letter Writer, please understand from all these letters that:

2. Songs running through heads is just a strange little part of The Human Condition; and,

1. Probably, you are not racist. You just have a song running through your head; and,

3! As Carey suggested, please go out and do something real. Even if the song does not fade, your actual action will put the stupid tune into perspective, and you will not care anymore.

Alberto Gonzales, you have sacrificed yourself for that W. Twit Bush. Do you already have a million bucks in the bank? I cannot figure out how you might have a million bucks, because you have spent your entire adult life in "public service."

Now you are an obvious liar. Your NeoCon sponsors will not hire you, because you appear to be stupid.

Bad luck to you, Tio Torture! Many good Americans hope you will wind up in the gutter. Many of us hope you will wind up on a plane to Egypt, to be tortured, with "pain equivalent to the pain of death." (Your immortal words!)

Rot in Egypt. Rot in Hell. Buena suerte!

That silly ding-dong Gonzales spoke of "defecation," and incest in the same breath as oral sex. Yikes, I think. (?) Reassure me, please, America.

Is oral sex okay? Is it part of the regular married Sextathon? Or do the fundamentalists not allow it?

In my house, we allow it. And we like it. Are we wrong? Has Tio Alberto Gonzales never had a hum-job? Has he never given a hum-job? Are suck-offs and lick-outs not allowed in NeoCon America???

Yee-oww! Say it ain't so!

To Mark Denny, mw213, and others who argue for staying in Iraq:

We, the USA, made Iraq worse now than Iraq was under Saddam. Our soldiers are the fuel in the fire of Iraq. We need to pull out that precious fuel. And let the fire burn down.

Eventually, in a cooler future, maybe we can go back and help rebuild Iraq. Now we just need to leave.

Urban Saints do this sort of thing. Quietly, but steadily, let's keep this up in Oakland and Detroit and Grand Rapids and everywhere else. Let us keep busy, and help out, and never feel guilty about our leaders' sins. Let us stay below their radr, and keep on keeping on.

God bless you, and all the other nice, busy people.

His name is Mike, and Mike is five years younger than you. Seriously! Mike is my pal for the last several years. We met at an old job.

I never have seen his male parts, but his feet are huge. This is a sort-of saintly guy who has cared for his aging parents, but he is is a hip guy too, who has been involved in the music biz in New York City.

Mike is tall. His only downside: He says he does not match with tiny women.

Somehow, through Salon or Cary, please contact me. I will introduce you to Mike.