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Sunday, Nov 8, 2009
holaamigo
Published Letters: 143
This guy was unusual in that he killed his daughter because she wouldn't wear a hijab. Was he unusual in expecting his daughter to wear one? Isn't that oppressive in itself?
In some Islamic countries, stoning women who commit adutery, lashing women who go out with a non-familial male companion, and killing girls who date outside the clan, is the rule of the law.
When someone from such a state moves here, are we to expect they automatically change their beliefs, that they now think women should be allowed to wear what they want, drive, get jobs, etc?
I dont' assume that most Muslims are incapable of living in an open, non-islamic society. But, this guy, the people who want to kill Ayaan Hirsi Ali and Salman Rushdie, and people who think they can tell women to wear hijabs/burkhas/whatever, are barbarians. A country that invites them should understand it does so at the expense of the liberties of it's own citizens, particularly women.
Trudy, I agree, it is a culture clash. I actively side with the one where girls aren't forced or expected to wear any particular garb, especially when men aren't expected to.
If a culture thinks that women need to cover up in some way, whether it's for modesty, or out of hatred of women, I look down on that culture. I also don't like the stoning stuff either. Just kind of my personal preference.
I agree with Ramesees, it seems like broadsheet only wants to critisize certain groups and I expect it's because it's politically correct to dis christians but not islamic immigrants, even though in islamic countries, women are subjected to far worse things than abstinence education.
Trudy,
I am expected to wear a shirt wear I work and no, I don't feel oppressed by that. If I was expected to cover my head with a hijab, I would feel oppressed. If you can't appreciate the difference that's your problem. They aren't the same to me, your debating gymnastics notwithstanding.
As far as this, 'When I was fourteen I wasn't allowed to wear shirts that showed my bra strap. Do you look down on my Mother for that?'
Answer - yeah, somewhat. If she forced you to wear a burkha, I'd think much less of her though.
You apparently find me inconsistent. I like to think I am using my judgement based on the world I live in.
By the way, if girls got killed for showing their bra straps, I hope you would be against that too.
I never said otherwise. Though the girl who was murdered apparently did have problem with it.
Also, regarding this - 'You don't feel oppressed by wearing a shirt when Men aren't expected to.' I said I didn't feel oppressed by having to wear a shirt at work. Where I work, men are expected to wear shirts.
If you want to think in terms of universals here are a couple: Freedom - this girl should have had the freedom not to wear a hijab, equality - women should be treated equally to men. These are universal in that I don't respect any culture insofar as they disregard these principals.
Im with you solitaire. I moved to halfway across the country when I went to college, and left most of my family back in Mass. After my first year I never went back for Xmas or anything else. I used to feel a little guilty about it but I grew out of that. I refuse to suffer because it's traditional.
People used to invite me to stay with/visit their family for these holidays, but I brushed them off too. Honestly, most of my friends envy my freedom and have told me so.
(BTW, if you want to visit people, you don't need a holiday to do it.)
I love Xmas, and all my days off from work. I like to sleep late, watch football and putter around the house. This is heaven to me.
Wow, I am impressed with Lori Gottleib's self absorbtion. Anyone who doesn't want what she want's is in denial? Nice!
Personally, I know lots of people who are single and happy about that fact. Not everyone wants a kids either,(not that I expect Lori to believe that).
Her article reminded me of a recent piece by Kay Hymowitz. Her thesis was that guys in their 20's and 30's like to play video games and read maxim and are therefore not proper adults, ie. married people.
Somebody forgot to tell them it's not 1953 anymore I guess.
If Lori does end up getting married, I feel sorry for her husband, she seems like a real nasty piece of work.
Dump this jerk.
On top of everything else, she dragged Juno into it, probably because she doesn't trust her readers to follow an argument w/o an up to date pop culture reference.
Couple of points - you're young, college can be socially confusing, and you don't have to live up to anyone elses expectations. If you're more on the quiet side, that's cool. If you want to be more outgoing, that's cool too, it just may take a while to get the hang of the game. Game is a good metaphor in that you can score and miss sometimes, but, you know, it doesn't have to be a competition either.
The acting lesson suggestion might not be a bad idea either. I recall Oscar Wilde: "Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth."
Cheers.
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Salon headlines in your mailbox
