Oh good grief. How does 'covering' someone mean you know someone? Covering someone is not a friendship. People in intimate relationships are constantly amazed, disappointed and challenged by what they learn about their spouse. It seems ridiculous for a reporter to write an entire piece on how he thought he "knew" Edwards - when I think it's rather obvious that "covering" someone is not an intimate or reciprocal relationship, and, yes - Surprise! - you don't know everything about your colleagues, neighbors or that guy on the subway you've sized up.

It sounds like you work at Salon? I'm not sure how long I've been a reader; maybe 2 or 3 years on and off. My recollection is that the site used to be really good and that it went downhill around the time of the redesign. I don't know who preceded Joan Walsh, but my feeling was that it was a higher quality opinion/news source til 2-3 or so years ago. I haven't followed the names of who does or did what.

The premise of Shapiro's piece is as ridiculous as many of the others I see on the site.

I recently went to town about the David Carr piece in the Letters section. I was so disappointed that Salon actually used someone who knew the author to interview him. The interviewer actually wrote something like: David is a good guy; I know him. He once suggested my name for a job.

WTF? Where is the journalism? I mean, couldn't they find an interviewer who didn't know Carr and could ask *non-obsequious* questions about his book?

In this case, an editor could have stepped in and said to Shapiro: That's an interesting story idea, but I don't think we'd run it since it's pretty obvious that no one really "knows" politicians and celebrities; that's just our perception. How about a story on XXX? Please pitch something like that and we'll talk about it. Thanks.

The job of an editor is to protect the good name of Salon; not let people with poor judgment run amok. I don't know who Joan Walsh is; I very occasionally read her columns and see her on TV.

She seems like a nice enough person, but if the other editors are somehow afraid of her, they should start speaking up. Someone over there must have decent editorial judgment. Maybe they could occasionally have a voice.

I'm not sure if anyone has posted this link, yet, but it is well worth watching. Don't drink milk while you're watching it if you don't want to spit it out...

It's called: Portrayal Of Obama As Elitist Hailed As Step Forward For African Americans

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/portrayal_of_obama_as_elitist

This is one of the most nuanced, insightful answers I have seen to any question posed about anything! Cary: you have probably helped many, many people today. You were most definitely born to be a writer. When someone is able to articulate something that is "true" to the human experience, it is thrilling to read.

I'm in awe of your response, too. Did you coin this?

"Learning to love someone irrespective of the chemical cocktail they may serve is hardly glamorous."

Some people learn this earlier than others; some never learn it. Like many, I learned it later in life. The LW's understanding of love is excrutiatingly painful to those of us who once thought love was about "chemistry." Hopefully, one day the LW will learn that love is about controlling your impulses and giving your attention fully to another. Walking in their shoes, feeling their pain, and other accurate cliches.

How did any of us learn this? By going through the excrutiating process the LW is describing. It is not unlike the unrequited love of a 14-year-old for his beautiful teacher. One day he will learn that the feelings he defines as love are not those of love at all - but basic human feelings of longing and emptiness. As wonderful as this woman is - she is a cardboard cut-out to the LW. She could be anyone. Once he learns the truth of this, he will get better.

LW, I know exactly how you feel; I know all too well what you're going through. I too grieve and cry for all that I've lost and all that I'll never have.

Still, I think deering may be right.

Have you considered anti-depressants? You are looking at your life through a veil of depression. You could argue that this is a natural human place that you want to stay, but what compels you to stay?

Maybe it's like John McCain staying in Vietnam for years of torture when he could have walked out the prison door years earlier...

He didn't have to stay. Everyone knows prisoners of war parrot what their captors tell them; no one could have possibly thought him disloyal for parroting their propaganda.

But he stayed for more torture for some principle that only mattered to him. Wouldn't he have done more good coming home to his family? (Well, maybe not to his first wife, but you know what I mean...).

Don't follow the John McCain philosophy (and certainly don't vote for him...). You don't need to be this depressed. Please try an anti-depressant and then reevaluate your life.

Also, volunteer to help others. Become a Big Sister in the Big Brothers/Big Sisters program. It has helped my depression enormously - and has helped a young girl about 10,000 times more than it's helped me.