So take a class, make a list of important books you’ve never read, take that inexpensive trip you’ve always dreamed of, volunteer, join some clubs and start living! You can’t wait around for your husband or your kids to magically make your life interesting anymore then they could depend on you to make their lives fascinating. I’m sure you have some sort of fantasy about what your life would be like when your husband is dead (a terrible but normal day dream) – so make your life like that right now.

And I think some other posters have a point with the menopause thing. So go see a doctor and check out some books and take care of yourself.

While I’m sure I use the word ‘robbed’ more often, I’ve used the word ‘raped’ to mean the same thing. And while I can see myself using it regarding a sports loss or bad business deal it only applies if your ‘win’ was stolen out from under you; if the referee was crooked or that hand-shake deal was a big lie. And as Webster's points out this is appropriate usage and not slang.

I did read the article we’re talking about and the ‘Friday Night Lights’ episode is the only example I see of 'rape’ being used to mean humiliate. Are we really basing this ‘slang trend’ on one line from one episode of must see TV?

I like ‘health issues.’ It’s vague but true and I doubt people will want to ask you too many questions – they’ll save the uncomfortable questions for your references so you need to have great ones who won’t mind omitting some important facts.

When I’m looking for work I’ll have a couple of friends, posing as potential employers, call both my former employers and my references to see what they’re saying about me (do this even if your references are friends – you need to know for sure). This gives you the knowledge you need to change your references if necessary and it lets you know what HR is actually saying about you so you can preemptively respond. ‘We let so-and-so go and would not hire him again’ is the worst they can say – they might just be giving employment dates so it isn’t necessarily the big issue you think it is.

You should also know that if you list a reference from your former company most potential employers won’t also call HR at that company, or if they do they’ll be satisfied with employment dates. So let a potential employer know who they should call, what the working relationship was, check up on what that person is saying about you and you’ve got a solid chance that’s all the background checking that happens.

But more importantly, and to the heart of the question, what have you been doing for the past two years? For me that would be the larger red flag on your resume. You need to be able to put a positive spin on your most recent work experience. I hope you’ve been volunteering or doing some sort of work that’s meaningful to you – maybe you can spin your recovery work in that direction without giving anything personal away.

The very last line of this letter says, ‘but I’m married.’ It’s such a short letter I’m not really sure how this is even up for debate. This letter writer thinks his married and working life is at odds with a contemplative life.

I’d expect someone seeking a ‘Contemplative Life’ would know what that means, I’d have expected the guy to have already done some basic reading on the subject (I think Thomas Merton is a great place to start) and I’d expect, at the very least, that Centering Prayer was already a part of this person’s daily life. I just can’t imagine that a person who would come up with ‘but I’m married’ hasn’t done even the most basic research, reading and meditation.

If my husband came to me today and told he wanted to give be a fisherman ‘but he’s married’ I’d question why I’ve never seen him with a rod and reel. I mean – this guy has this ‘idea’ that requires him to question his relationship with his wife and his work. He sounds like at 20 year old kid who just read Siddhartha (and didn’t really understand it).

With so much hard-core porn available on the internet Playboy is not the over-sexed publication it once was (probably why it’s not doing so well financially). It’s been a long time since I picked up a Playboy but, as I recall, it’s mostly boob shots done in very flatter light.

When I was a kid I had a deck of playing cards from the 50s with topless shots of women – at the time these playing cards were printed I’m sure they were very risqué but by the time I got my hands on them, as a pre-teen in the early 80s, they were just pretty and vintage. In fact my grandmother gave me that deck of playing cards. I think Playboy has very nearly become that wholesome.

If you’re a poor woman working a crappy, low-paying job getting two days in a row off of work and making special transportation plans while juggling other family/personal responsibilities is often impossible. And who’s to say you’ll get an appointment the next day? It could put off this procedure by weeks – and that’s in fact what it’s designed to do.