I’m not sure why it’s such a big deal or what it even means to her. For instance – would the LW consider a lesbian to be a virgin just because she’s never been penetrated by a penis? Or would she consider a couple of fingers to be the end of her virginity? And what about her ass? His mouth? Her mouth?

Regarding early sexual experiences I recall wanting to stay away from intercourse the first few times out just so we build a good foundation – but still I’d have been pretty disappointed if it all ended with a few firm smacks on the ass and a kiss goodnight. What a lame adult spanking that would be! Just saying ‘virgin’ and ‘spanking’ is so loose it could mean anything. Without being explicit and unashamed she’s a kid playing an adult game and she really is begging for trouble.

I also think an interest in being dominated, but having lots of specific rules as to what that means, is pretty common among women. That’s how lots of women let go while still staying in control. If that’s your interest it’s not like the only outlet is Craig’s List or a BSDM Club/reading list. In my experience it’s actually pretty normal.

Even if the cousin is just off her rocker crazy I’d choose to stay away from BOTH parties. Because really this is about more then the cousin and her ex: it’s about mom, dad, grandma, Aunt Dotty, Cousin Phil, Christmas, the summer picnic, future kids and on and on. Some letters here are saying ‘good riddance’ to all that family nonsense and the constraints it entails – that’s a price they’re willing to pay. Is the LW willing to pay it?

And what is the ex? This is someone who has done her cousin wrong (I’m really interested to know that detail of that even if the LW has heard far too much), someone who dosen’t really matter and someone who the LW could easily live without. So is it worth it to make this about principals? Is this really where the LW wants to make her big stand for independence?

The LW has gotten Europe and the occasional beer out of this – but there is a price for what the LW’s doing/done and she’s going to have to pay up. Only she can tell us if it's worth it.

“Cousin is not simply withdrawing. She is bringing her issues to LW's mother so that it interferes in that relationship. How far is this grease fire supposed to be allowed to spread?”

Think about what you said. The LW's mother would be the cousin's aunt. Are you saying that the niece and aunt shouldn’t be speaking to each other because it might upset the LW? I don’t think you can have it both ways like that. This is exactly why so many people are suggesting, if the ex is really so unimportant, family should come first.

Is the mom giving her daughter a hard time? Is she choosing sides? All we know is she’s ‘disappointed.’ Honestly – if I had a nickel for every time my mother was ‘disappointed’ with me I’d be a very wealthy woman.

The religion, the pot, the daughter’s party – none of it matters. Those things all just muddy up the fact that the LW’s marriage is over and her ex has moved on. Whatever happened in the past doesn’t matter – her ex’s future is one of those things the LW can’t control or influence and she needs to accept it.

In my area these dogs are breed for size and aggression. All the time you see people walking huge, un-neutered or nursing animals covered with nasty scars – it could only be from fighting. And they are breed poorly. Often you get gimpy, shy, sick and neurotic animals with real problems – this is very much the same thing you’d expect from a puppy mill. Breeding matters. This story has a context and to ignore it is naive.

The dog that bit me was a rescue animal my friend’s roommate was fostering. Her origins were probably not so different from Bruno’s. We were on a walk, the roommate was holding the leash, and as were waiting at a busy intersection for the light to change the dog lunged at me. My bite sounds worse then the one in this story: 4 neat puncture wounds on the back of my calf.

It was lucky that the dog bit me – it would have been so much worse if she’d have gone for the small breed dog next to her or one of the young children standing nearby. I did not sue or even file a police report. But I did follow up with my friend’s roommate: the fostering agency made the decision to put the dog down.

Bruno was a good dog. The dog that bit me was a good dog too. Being worried about what might have happened with Bruno was a big part of this story – it wouldn’t have rung true at all if it had been omitted.

And I'd ask breeders of Pitts (and simlar breeds) why breed at all? Why not focus on rescue? If it's really for the love of the breed woudln't this be the best thing to do?

I read it years ago and I remember enjoying it. Not great lit but a fun beach read. This movie could have been the perfect commentary for these economic times – all about going overboard, getting into trouble and digging yourself back out. But it sounds like it’s just another lame, romantic comedy. Too bad.