Letters to the Editor
Anne in NYC
Published Letters: 342 Editor's Choice: 38
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Time to polish off that resume!
[Read the article: I stood on principle and was harshly reprimanded]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Oh, this LW sounds young. If I had to guess I’d say ‘first job out of school.’
I’m an executive assistant. I have been doing this for about 15 years. Within that I’m also a personal assistant because that’s just how this job works. I have walked dogs, picked up dry cleaning and made coffee. And there are important meetings, urgent contracts and last minute travel plans too. This job just IS a mixed bag.
My boss is a really busy guy and very often his personal and professional life come into conflict – it’s my job to smooth that over so he can concentrate on his work. If I’m busting his balls over a few personal expenses on the AmEx bill or I’m chastising him over vacation I pretty much deserve to be let go because that's not helping him. I'm also not much fun to work around if that's the kind of game I'm playing.
And finally, contrary to the advice of lots of other posters, unless you’re being sexually harassed, you know someone is embezzling funds or something equally as serious, you should never go to HR. It makes you look like a cry baby who needs constant hand holding. Because HR knows how hard/expensive it was to hire for that executive and they know how easy/cheap it was to hire for that person’s assistant.
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What could the boss have done?
[Read the article: I stood on principle and was harshly reprimanded]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I do wish the LW would have told us what was up exactly because I’m curious. But in my advice would be the same no matter what – polish up that resume and get a new job now. Right now the LW can get a new job without using her current boss as a reference (any new employer will know the LW’s interviewing is a secret from her current employer) but as soon as the LW is no longer employed there that rule changes and everyone will want to speak with the current boss. Forget right and wrong – I’m talking about next month's rent and groceries.
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Re: But I think the LW has a reasonable complaint
[Read the article: I stood on principle and was harshly reprimanded]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]“in that if a superior can't get their job done without an assistant to attend to private errands, then the superior should be hiring their own assistant out-of-pocket rather than using company employees, whom the company pays for.”
My boss is also our company’s Principal Officer. In our case it means he owns the company. If things go south he’s the one holding the bag – if things go wonderfully he buys a summer home. So if I went into his office and implied he was stealing from the company I'd have made an awful mistake. I imagine my boss would also be very insulted and he’d expect an apology from me. The truth is if I did something so offensive I'd offer that apology up way, way before being asked.
There are lots of reasons why one person gets perks others don’t. Sometimes partners have special arrangements based on their personal wants and needs. One person might get a larger salary, another a lager share of the company, another an expense account and another might get a full time assistant to use as they see fit.
But our LW dosen’t seem to know or care about any of that. She thinks that walking into the boss’s office and demanding answers to delicate questions is the way to go – and it’s certainly not. She should have started her search for answers much lower on the totem pole.
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American Apparel
[Read the article: American Apparel sells the "Cadillac of vibrators"]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Don Charney is a sleaze and his product has gotten cheap, odd and unflattering. Who wants to look like they’re in a 1980s work out video? And what’s up with all that metallic lame? I think this company has become a bit of a joke even if the t-shirts are nice.
And the vibrator? It’s just cheap publicity and I’m sort of annoyed with myself for even responding to it. I’d rather be talking about the sexual harassment cases against Charney.
Anyway - if I really wanted to kick it old school/ironic with my Magic Wand purchase (and they are nice – not scary or too loud IMO) I’d go to Sharper Image.
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Mom?
[Read the article: My failed lesbian romance]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]“The damage my bad choices did to my kids was profound and I didn't wise up until they were adults. They long ago forgave their father (who has been in recovery for 30 years while I kept looking for new people who would create the chaos I needed), their relationships with me are fragile and far more judgmental than the readers here. Bottom line is that they didn't buy my lame excuses for failing to be a responsible adult. And they were right.”
I also forgave my abusive father for years of neglect - but my relationship with my mother has been more and more difficult as I get older. I now see that her game was the opposite of neglect – rather then ignoring me she pulled me right into her crazed drama (my mom had a Gisele too). And when I think back to her crying and being sad over the choices she made (and being a sad dinner time family sure qualifies) I don’t have a whole lot of sympathy for her. I don’t see her as a victim anymore and I feel cheated that she spun it that way when I was just a little girl. This article brings all those bad things up for me because this author still seems blind to what it means to be the hole to her husbands horns.
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Nice one, Neal
[Read the article: Confessions of a salvia eater]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I’ve never been a huge Pollack fan – except that I really liked this article. It was personal without being over the top personal.
And regarding the Jew-fro – I hear the phrase and it makes me wish I had those crazy, wonderful cork-screw curls too. It’s not a nasty term at all and I think the people who are getting all worked up about it need to relax.