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Sunday, Nov 8, 2009
elliotc
Published Letters: 5
LW, it's a perfect storm: you're 25, everybody you KNOW is out partying, and you're married with nobody to play with, because he's gone all the time. Of course you feel caged. A few concrete things for your "to do" list:
1. Consider whether remorse and regret are a comfort zone. Religious indoctrination can do that---a constant message that you need to place your life in the hands of God can make you doubt your judgment over time, and so remorse and regret "feel" virtuous.
2. Lestat1's advice to seriously consider traveling with hubby at least once per month is BRILLIANT. His absence makes it impossible for you to gauge what a positive impact he could otherwise have on your life. You've moved past missing him; now you're excising him. Get back into his space and see some cool spots. Visit a museum or a record store while he's at work.
3. Use your free time to pursue a passion----now is the time to discover cooking or gardening or fitness. Sitting around regretting your choices is poison--a vicious cycle of boredom, resentment, and regret.
4. Go to counseling. Even if this marriage ends, you will live the remaining years of your life feeling a lot better about this if you KNOW you did EVERYTHING you could to salvage it.
Good luck and I wish you the best,
Signed, a very happily married 41 year-old who partied her butt off at 25.
Alex, I love you, but your spin is easily twisted. "Everybody knows that America should attack foreign countries who are an iminent threat. Only Washington elites call this obvious principal 'the Bush Doctrine.' Real Americans call it 'common sense.'"
You're missing the point. It's not that she didn't know "the Bush Doctrine." It's that she agrees with it. It's that she would push to have Georgia and Ukraine enter NATO, and provoke Russia into a military conflict to which she would respond with force. It's that McCain already wants to bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran."
But neither wants to raise taxes. And so in four years, you have two more wars, a bigger defense budget, and an even bigger deficit. The current accounts deficit and the national debt are already destroying the economy. We have Lehman Brothers failing today, we lost Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, Bear Sterns already gone.
The only difference between George Bush and Sarah Palin - - - is lipstick.
That's how to scare the "heartland." That's how to scare Joe Six Pack. Who gives a shit about "the Bush Doctrine."
A four-month old special needs baby. A 17 year old pregnant daughter. A son in Iraq. Any ONE of these three things will affect somebody's job performance--male or female, at least in the medium term. She has ALL THREE AT ONCE! And the GOP is sticking to this absurdity that none of the three will affect her job performance. A private sector company would NEVER relocate a promising young star executive under these circumstances. They would give her some time to let things settle down and then give her the promotion. SOMETHING WILL HAVE TO GIVE!!! Either the country or her family. WHY is the GOP forcing her to choose between country and family!? Why didn't they wait until she was ready in about four years??? Do they think she is made of cryptonite - - because she was the mayor of Wasilla and governor of AK for 20 months???? Is that the same as curing cancer??? Or inventing time travel?? Because that's what being President would require for someone who is enduring her situation right now, and we HAVE to consider the bottom of the ticket in McCain's case, in a way that we normally wouldn't!
The compassionate thing for Obama to do is point all of this out. I'm not being critical of Sarah. She has some impressive competencies. I'm a 41 year old mother of one little son who thinks she's overextended, and can't BELIEVE the GOP wants such a huge pound of flesh from this poor woman.
To everybody who wants media to concentrate solely on the Presidential candidates: good advice re conventional wisdom a la Frank Rich: "America always votes the top of the ticket." We're having an unusual year folks. The actuarial reality means only boneheads vote for McCain without considering the bottom of the ticket. Dems and GOP inside Beltway are exquisitely aware of this. Think about how different things would be if he'd picked Ridge or Bloomberg . . . . .
As a previous poster commented: if the GOP is so convinced that the media is left-leaning, and was "in the tank" for Obama, why wouldn't they welcome a return to the Fairness Doctrine? Moreover, if the Democrats have a monopoly on favorable media coverage, why on earth would they push for a return of the Fairness Doctrine? You can't have it both ways. Once again, this political ideology demands absolutely nothing from itself in the way of consistency, coherence, and intellectual rigor. The examples are endless (the one first coming to mind is the "generational theft" thing after 8 years of unprecedented borrow and spend).
Much of the initial coverage about Fort Hood turned out to be wrong. Is there anything wrong with that?
The accountability imposed by another country for the CIA's kidnapping and torture reveals much about our own.
Fox News' morning show plays to type, talking about whether Muslims in the Army should face "special debriefings"
The survivor and author is upset about comparisons some on the right are making to genocide
Once seen as a lunatic fringe, reactionary anti-women groups are courting respectability
Salon headlines in your mailbox
