I will have it one day (I have too many ideas for internet -- and other-- businesses that are not even being implemented by anyone else, for instance).

There are always ways to make it, to become rich. There always are. I found out a few years ago, my grandad in commie Poland had run a leather trade to make things happen (whod'a thunk?) and was quite successful with it.

Once you put out the shingle enough times, eventually something DOES take off and you become richer than you know what to do with (hopefully) and it makes the rest of the struggle seem worthwhile.

What would you RATHER do? Watch teevee all day? Of course not. You thrive on building and creating and nurturing, as I do.

My new tack? I have quit believing anyone else. It is ALL lies. I lost all my money in the real estate bust. Analyzing what led to it, the whole of it was fed by a progression of lies that were enamating from others in the real estate and banking businesses. Lies that were fed to these people as if they are open computers, to be fed the data that makes for the most efficient production of money for the entities concerned.

Think about it, when you get a mortgage, the banks ALLOW you to 'rent' their property while taking on massive risk yourself for a third of a century. On the face of it, it is an absurd notion.

But we have been led to believe by the money makers that this sad state is bliss.

I intend to buy everything on cash from now on. I do not trust ANYONE. No more mortgages, no more loans. I am losing my house in the next few months because the banks decided to STOP handing out loans to those who were originally willing to buy $750k houses. The market for these houses has collapsed, despite my house being a custom design by an award winning architect. The number of people who can buy a house of my size is thus a fraction of what it was a few years ago, leading to ongoing collapsing prices. You think the banks give a flip? They got theirs.

In other words, all my goodwill and good intent and hard work in the world did not stop the outside world from fucking me over totally.

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My advice, start a hands-on business. Quit the money making pyramid scheme piffle. Start small, double check and triple check all your calculations. Hedge your bets. Diversify. Trust NO ONE. Sock away the money in ultra safe places-- beyond the almighty reach of the dollar, which is being collapsed deliberately ANYWAY to usher in the NWO.

You are lucky. You have your health and someone who loves you.. All the money means nothing in light of this.

I was not hated, nor bullied really. I had my group of weird artsy friends. I actually had an interesting life outside of high school.

But high school was absolutely dreadful to me. Something about it still grinds like nails on a chalkboard. The hormone driven collective Animal Farm rage maybe? The comprehension that so many probably thought this was the best that life was ever going to get? The indifference of my peers? The suspicion that these people were indicative of the crap one will have to put up with throughout life?

After high school, I went off to NYC to an art school to study architecture. World of difference, I began to feel like I could fit in somewhere.

They were going to have a 25 year reunion this year, my high school. It was CANCELLED.

women really just do not 'get' men...

Also, it helps that they apparently think women aren't too competitive and won't get distracted by nookie. "The sexual drives and big egos of male leaders have gotten in the way of politics in this country,"

The reference to the 'sexual drives' is about what men do to get power so they can have access to sex. It is not about the minor distractions of sex.

Many men mold their whole lives around gaining the most power and money in order to have access to the most desirable women.

When the guys refer to this, they talk about the male ego that is loosed to engage in this activity.