This whole thing stinks of a Hitler complex, but with appearance via fashion rather than ethnicity (and there's even some of that).

I hate that a company based solely on exclusivity is so successful, because it's exclusive in the last politically-correct way; based on physical appearance. My life has been made hell because I'm an overweight woman, and the only time I had a boyfriend and a good job was when I was much thinner (which didn't last long because of some medical issues).

Why should I be judged as sub-human for being a little big, just as my ancestors were judged as sub-human for being jewish?

The problem is, A&F's success made every company think this kind of discrimination is fair play. Restaurants, even in North Carolina, only hire blondes under 5'5". Offices say a candidate must have a "professional appearance", which I was bluntly told meant a size 8 or smaller for women. Even opera companies have weight limits for cast members. Suddenly in this country there is a caste system based on something that most people have little control of. Unless I starve myself and make myself ill, I will never be "skinny". It's not in my genes. Does that make me less of a singer or waitress or office worker?

America doesn't need to teach its youth any more hatred than it already has, and all this store and "lifestyle" teach is how to judge others as different from what's "acceptable and good", and therefore not worthy of human dignity.

This trend is causing absurdly high mental illness, annorexia, and suicide rates in teens, and even young adults. Every company has to be somewhat socially responsible, and A&F is not "cool" or "cute" for shucking that responsibility.

-Take a heavy girl to dinner, then when she looks at the menu say "you're not eating are you? You dont WANT to keep looking like this do you?"

-Show up, say "Damn, you're fatter than your picture even", and spit on the girl. She might have a friend who will write in sharpie on your car in revenge.

-Take a girl home and sleep with her early on, then blame her, saying "If I was horny enough to be with you, you shouldn't have taken advantage of how desperate I was". Her hot friends will hear about it.

(Similarly- if you're drunk and hit on/sleep with a girl, don't blame her and accuse her of taking advantage of how desperate you were. Especially if she was drunk too.- that happened to my friend)

-Ignore phobias a girl mentions. If she says "I have a horrible fear of being physically held down", that is not an invitation to grab her and pin her down, or to suddenly tie her arms down in bed. It's not funny, really.

-Say you have to do an errand during a date, then when you get back, check your email and read responses to the Craigslist Casual Encounter ad you just posted- the one that says you're "on a date with an ugly girl and need some hot poon."

I had a guy do that! He ordered like $70 dinner for himself, and I spent all of $11 on my soda and salad because I had no money. When I only put down for my share he wsa indignant that I would go out and not be able to pay the whole tab. He left, and I had to call a friend to come over and lend me some money! Guys are the freeloaders they accuse women of being, lol.

Dear Judy Berman,

I love you. You know I love you. I CTY you. But now, I kinda have to hang you for putting that image in my head. holy gd.

-Farin

I've read salon.com every day for a long time, but I've never been so offended. To "smear" (to use your own word)those who support Israel, to paint them as fascists and dictatorial, is offensive and absurd. A Jewish state is a partial key to Jewish survival- especially in that region where everything around it is an Muslim nation-state. Palestine was never a country or people to be occupied. Isreal was certainly created messily, but to support those who would destroy the one home of a whole people truly is anti-semetic, not just anti-zionist.

This is the type of reporting that ignores Hezbollah attacks and only lambasts Israel's necessary response. To defend Ahmedinejad as non-threatening is sickening; allowing this ideology to spread (and supporting it) is a threat in and of itself.

I'm about as liberal as it comes, and I'm appalled that so many "liberals" feel it's their duty to demonize an already culturally oppressed people.

... to all kinds of greif. I have to be so careful not to tell most people any stories of my life- even in my late 20s, my peers are horrified. And not in a sympathetic way- in a way that makes them want to run screaming, and sometimes offended or taken aback that I mentioned anything, even in a different context.

How wonderful would it be if people were brought up to have strenght in their emotions FOR others- sympathy, empathy, instead of fear for themselves.

But the author sounds like she hasn't finished greiving either. Greiving is more than saddness at the event, more than sadness, anger, and resentment at others' reactions. It's learning to live with the sadness and the event, accepting it, not expecting it to leave, and leaving the anger behind.

... my mom is going to see this today and call me with a giant "I told you so". crap.