My observation is that I have known many people in a polyamorous relationship or an open marriage, and I have never. Once. Seen. One. Work. Out. There were two men in particular who I would have said would end up as poster children for happy polyamory. One couldn't handle it when his wife took a lover, and one is currently totally miserable in his relationship (though, with children involved, he hasn't given it up yet.) One woman insisted on it as a condition of being married, and she dumped a very long-suffering husband anyway. Another woman who was the primary was verbally and emotionally abused by the gf, but her boyfriend refused to believe her because the gf was sweet as pie around him and he was blinded by his infatuation. One ended with a restraining order against the bf just before their first child was born. At least two couples could only remain married by giving up polyamory altogether. There were various others that ended, amicably or disastrously, but they did end.

I admit all these things might happen to a monogamous couple, but the fail rate I've seen might described as "epic." I am also aware that I might know people happy in the life who just don't advertise it, and so my anecdotal observations are skewed. But man, it's not looking good from here.

That said, "an it harm none, do as thou wilt shall be the whole of the law." It could work, I just haven't seen it.

My question: I'm not sure it's completely fair to judge the longevity of a poly relationship by traditional monogamous standards. Is one of the points that the multiple partners stay together til death do them part? Or is it more or less intended to be serial relationships, and the fact that individuals can move on is built into the system? In that case, a 4-year poly relationship might be perfectly stable. For the record, a lot of those monogamous marriages that dissolve do so before or around the 5-year mark (thus spake my marriage counselor when we had trouble at 4 years.) Or does it depend?

Obviously I could go look this up, but I thought the answer might be informative for the whole class.

Okay, that headline might sound ironic, considering how many of these dumbass concepts sucked roc eggs. But seriously, this was done with such love and such respect for the original material. Respectfully disagree about the big action scenes: I'm the sort of person who nods off during big-budget blow-ups during summer movies, and I thought the ones in this movie were just right.

I've been prepared not to like Steve Carell every time a movie of his comes out, but at this point I'm forced to say I'm a fan. He has a light touch and rarely sinks to the least-common-denominator crap you get with Mike Myers 'n'them.

I was worried when I heard they were remaking Get Smart, but they did a great job on this one. Worth the exhorbitant movie ticket prices to see.

Portman won't help McCain in Ohio AT ALL. We finally(!) got totally sick of our entrenched Republican Machine and kicked the bastards out in 2006. Granted, the GOP is far from dead, and certainly new "hey, I'm the Real Deal!" Republicans are already crawling out of the woodwork. But I can't imagine that anyone who was part of the Old Guard will impress anyone. Even if they HAVE heard of him. (Me: "oh, they're talking about maybe Portman for McCain's VP." Husband: "Who?" Then again he doesn't follow politics at the state level like I do.)

He's not gonna choose Rice either. He desperately needs somebody not associated with the Bush administration, so Bush's "wife" isn't going to help, even with her superficial advantages. I seriously hope it's Lieberman. Between the two of them, they should appeal to about 4% of the population. Please, please, please....

I noticed some responders didn't even seem to have read the article (though I admit that I know about the case from other sources, having followed it with horrified fascination for some time.)

a) sociopaths are often married, they are quite charming on the surface and able to fool people into believing that they are actually, well, human.

b) she WASN'T with him anymore, they were getting a divorce. Granted, this was because she'd had an affair with his friend and business partner. But if that's punishable by death, hell, a lot of us would be widows now.

c) she saw him on that last day because they had kids together. Probably she thought he wanted to talk about something related to them. When you have kids with a man you're really tied to him forever, no matter how awful he is.

I thought that the point of the article was this creepy guy proclaiming his innocence pretty much right up to the second he led police to his wife's body. The pure depths of soullessness can be chilling. As can the blind irrationality of a person who thinks s/he's smarter than the entire criminal justice system. I'm glad her family finally gets to know the truth, and my heart goes out to those kids.

Hans, however, seems like the exact kind of guy to trip the override switch on my philosophical objection to capital punishment.