The TT SYA is more of a theraputic group of insiders. It is a good place for a LW, because they are more likely to be sympathetic and have experience with the problems. It can also be limiting when the letter really engenders a strong response. Sometimes the TT SYA can be an echo chamber of like minded people, who forget that others will not necessarily agree. There have been times that the SYA and the letters have been entirely opposite. The letters section is more of a cross section of opinion, and a reality check, rather than therapy. The writers are different, and that really gives a different cast to the environment.

I don't use this column for therapy, I read it for entertainment. I like the clash of opinions, and the fact that people here disagree. It reminds me that people do have competing and clashing opinions.

There are trolls, and they should be ignored. Having been to Slate.com, I can confidently say the trolls here are nothing compared to that crew. The trolls here are at least literate or semi-literate for the most part. Those trolls at Slate are sub-literate chain yankers.

I have noticed that most of the nasty letters come from people who are not Salon Premium users. That's food for thought.

Why are these high school people important? I think the last line, where the writer wonders why they were imbuing the reunion with so much importance, is really important. Cary is right when he writes

I think you are making the reunion a big deal because high school was a big deal and there are many powerful emotions still cooking after all those years...What you can do to get past the insanity is recognize ahead of time what it will actually be like and plan for that.

Her husband loves her, and she should wonder if they will match up to his eyes. If they reveal high school transgressions, well, shouldn't have rebuilt that car on the roof of the school. Actually, those high school transgressions seem so innocent now, in a world of MySpapce and Facebook and phone/internet sex.

I think that behind her question about why the reunion is causing all of this freak out is a really good question: why go to the reunion at all? Why is it important?

Maybe the other letter writers are right and she should wait to let the emotions settle. Then again, she might end up like me. I have no wish to go to my reunion, because I've stayed in contact with the ones I wanted to be with, and I really am not interested in the rest. Some people, over time, really do put high school aside and just move on. It is interesting to me how so many people analyze high school reunions as a form of therapy, or laying ghosts to rest.

Cary is right when he says "It's a bunch of strangers who used to know each other. You're not going to feel the way you used to feel, nor are you going to heal the past. You're going to be you, today's you, encountering people that you used to know but don't really know anymore."

The husband is probably very capable of taking care of himself. If he's a successful lawyer, he's dealt with boredom before. Take him. At least she'll have him to talk to, and snark on clothes with.

I don't want to be blamed for every stupid thing my government does. I won't blame innocent Poles for power-mad control freaks in their government.

The government is being crazy. It's ironic, given the old joke during communism over who the Poles would shoot first if the Eastern Germans and the Russians invaded. That the government banned alcohol is just nuts. John Paul II came to New Orleans, a very Catholic city, and no one banned alcohol. He's living in Italy, and they have the lowest birth rate in Europe, as well as vineyards all over the place.

The earlier poster hit it on the head- the government is very right wing and puritanical. They are using this as an excuse to go after stuff that offends them. They are, as another poster put it, "imposing their own personal Lent."

That Irish analogy is spot on. In Poland and Ireland, conservative Catholicism (and alcohol) were both methods of resistance to occupying foreign powers. Other countries have other methods of resistance.

The Roman Catholic Church does not ban ice cream, tampons, or alcohol. Nor does it ban bad taste (I'm a cradle Catholic and I've seen really bad taste- those youth groups and their "Jesus is my boyfriend" music is probably the lowest of bad taste out there). My question is, are they banning those topless ads on TV, too?