Leave. But don't abandon your investment and ruin your credit unless you are counseled by a clear thinking person with expertise that this somehow makes sense.

As for the people who think you, on principal, should keep the house and she should go . . . no, no, no. Forget principal. Practicality is the only important thing. The only one.

I speak as someone whose daughter has borderline personality disorder. I was fortunate that her worst symptoms didn't manifest until she was an adult and I could insist that she go. At the present time she lives in another state and has stabilized, but you never know for how long. All I can say is that living with someone with mental illness is no way to keep a job and no way to raise children.

The most important thing is to be up front with the kids: mom is ill, there are no good options, I've thought long and hard and consulted with the best people I know and this is what I've decided is best for us all. I loved your mother when I married her; I still do. We will do the best we can for her, but the sad truth is that sometimes people cannot be helped as much as we would like. It's very sad. It's very hard. But we're a family. We are going to stick by one another. We will stick by your mother to the greatest extent possible. And we will survive. And we will have happy times again. If you have any gift at all for making the kids laugh, use it. My significant other can make me laugh no matter what the circumstance and it is a great blessing.

And there must be a support group for people with bi-polar family members. I don't care if you are a group sort of a person or not. Join. Kids like to see their parents going out and doing things to help themselves. This is something tangible you could do; there might even be groups for kids.

Kids these days are not isolated. You can't keep them off Google. Not in the long run. Without Jenny Sanford's statement out there, there would be very little reason to think anyone cares about the kids and keeping their family together.

And yes, as horrible a situation as it is, and as unlikely to succede, they both owe it to the kids to stay together and be pleasant. Of course, the pleasant part is key.

For the most part I'm sympathetic to Jenny. She's in a nightmarish situation. That said, I have a hard time believing that Jenny never suspected anything. Even before Romeo started straying. When you're in a relationship you can feel things change. So many people try to ignore those changes, or even imagine that having yet another kid will fix things. I can't help but wonder if that's what happened here.

My daughter was rejected by her biological parents at age 12. Both signed away parental rights rather than give up destructive relationships and drug habits. She went in to foster care, group homes and failed adoptions. And finally, at age 15, to me. This allowed her to imagine that there were still people out there who, on some level, cared. Except that when she was 19 and went looking, they were no better off than before and still wanted little or nothing to do with her.

I guess the one thing she may have that you may not is to hope against hope that some day, they might just come around. Except, that they might not, and so far not so good.

There is no point is arguing over who hurts the most, or has the most right to be screwed up due to circumstances.

Please don't start sharing your pain haphazardly. One of my daughter's problems has been trying to get too close, too quickly. Again, and again, and again. There may not be group therapy for orphans. But you can sometimes find it for people with abandonment issues. Look into Dr. Linehan's model for dialetical behavior therapy.

Many people can find true homes in church, and there are many churches who have a pretty high tolerance for people who are just there for the company and can pass on some or all of the message. And there are others who have been damaged by church and are better off in Starbucks with a book.

Peace.