No, not the "I wanted to be a brilliant success" thing. That's not a goal, nor is it productive. What do you enjoy doing; what makes the time fly by when you do it and makes you want to keep on doing it? You need to figure out what that is. You are in a better position than most--at least you have financial security and a home. So, get to it.

Secondly, stop beating yourself up. It sounds to me that your standards are so unrealistic you've been sabotaging yourself--and that is one of the major roots of depression. Get therapy, and find out why you feel you have to be perfect (and brilliant.)

Thirdly, yeah, the drinking will make life real exciting. The hangovers, the vicious mood swings, the health problems, the black-outs, the drunken fights, the waking-up-not-knowing-how-you-got-there. And you being a depressed, frustrated person already--yeah, you'll be lots of laughs when the booze strips you down to your anger and unhappiness. Do _not_ drink to medicate your frustration. If you think you've "wasted" your life thus far, trust me--you will truly waste it if you become an alcoholic.

"In his daughter, a father discovers a person whose very bloodline ensures she will be charming to him: at the precise moment that his wife is fading into middle age, her beauty resurges in the daughter -- there's that unlined face you fell in love with so many years before!"

Yep, because the _only_ reason a man marries is because he loves a woman's "unlined face." And the only thing he and his daughter could possibly have in common is that she's got the same face. Yeesh, if Flanagan's Electra complex was any more virulent...well, it doesn't bear thinking about. If she has daughters, life must be hell for them, what with mom regarding girls as useless and watching like a hawk for the day when dad decides his daughters are more "charming" to him than his "faded" wife. :P

I definitely agree with other posters who noted LW needs to find friends/a support system outside his church before he "comes out." It sounds like he's in one of those places where going to church is unofficially mandatory if one is to have any kind of social/business life--and the pressure to conform-or-be-shut-out is brutal. (And, frankly, it doesn't sound like his wife is going to be much help--if LW feels he can't talk to _her_ about his true feelings, that's not a good sign.) Having folks in his corner who will have his philosophical back and make him feel less alone (at least) will give LW courage to stand up for himself and what he believes in. And LW, you should be prepared for the worst to happen, because in that kind of religious environment toeing the line is often more valued than live-and-let-live.

"You CAN NOT gain weight when you eat mostly fruits, veggies, legumes and seafood."

That kind of diet is not cheap here in the real world. Nor is it easy to come by (or cheap) if you live where fresh fruits and veggies or real, unprocessed seafood aren't plentiful, And these aren't foods that manufacturers often have coupons for, either. Please forgive the rest of us for not being as wealthy as yourself--though I would imagine most of us are certainly less snotty and ignorant.

Sure, Spitzer did a lot to clean up Wall Street. But ultimately, he broke the law. And did any of his partisans here ever think that Spitzer's sub-rosa booty calls could have easily put him at the mercy of folks who would not have hesitated to use that leverage on him? He doesn't think he really did anything wrong, which means if he gets back into public office, this whole mess could easily happen again--with worse results. If he wants to exercise power, he better do so in fixing his own issues.

Others have already said it, but your links not only prove zip, they have nothing to do with whether a husband should stay with an addicted wife. Man, being a woman-hater really fucks up your brain cells, doesn't it?

From Wikipedia, on Sodom and Gomorrah:

"In Ezekiel 16:48-50 God compares Jerusalem to Sodom, saying "Sodom never did what you and your daughters have done." He explains that the sin of Sodom was that "She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. They were haughty and did detestable things before me."

Nothing like you conservative scum, right? ;)

"But only as long as we repent. Which means we can do whatever we want, as long as, at some point, we admit that it's bad and show appropriate public contrition when called for, so that we can be "forgiven" and therefore redeemed."

Um, wouldn't it make more sense for these folks to put their energy into doing real good and helping others instead of constantly polishing their "heaven cred?" God knows, it's not that there is a lack of things to do in the former department. ;)

"Gay marriage is simply a confirmation that society no longer has room for the traditional family.... It also serves as a protection of single persons and childless, which will have allies in any battle to kept the government from taxing them for the benefit of married couples."

Um, just how the hell does _that_ work? And it's so nice to reconfirm that bigots like RobbySh hate and want to control anyone who isn't traditionally-married-with-baybee.

"Is it really too much to ask that pundits on law have at least a thimble full of legal knowledge? The ignorance of law here is astounding!"

If Wingnut is Karl Rove--or even Dick Cheney--he's hella-more stupid than we thought he was. :)

Prove that anyone here has said any such thing to a man in this same situation. Provide links to said posts. Thought you couldn't. :P