Letters to the Editor
deering
Published Letters: 1203 Editor's Choice: 20
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Huh?
[Read the article: Should strip-club bachelor parties be men-only?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]>As to whether or not I change what I say or my behavior around married friends, I am usually aware of what I am saying and my effect upon others. I would NEVER act overtly sexy around my married friends and their husbands.<
Yeah, well, neither would I. Or most women with sense. But you are not taking in account that a husband who wants to cheat will find _any_ behavior sexy. (This is the same kind of "she dressed sexy, so she was asking for it" attitude one finds in people talking about rape cases.) You are _still_ assuming that you have to be the "virtuous" one so married men won't hit on you. I'm saying that why should you or any single woman have to tie themselves up in knots worrying if they are "chaste-acting" enough when around married friends? Why should we bear the burden of someone else's wandering libido--or some wife's refusal to see the truth about their mate? As far as I'm concerned, if a married friend starts pulling that crap, I'm outta there unless they get their heads straight. Their insecurites are their problem, not mine.
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Heh...
[Read the article: Should strip-club bachelor parties be men-only?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]>Because I want to keep them and because people are competitive and envious by nature -- even nice ones.<
But this is a game you can't win if people are paranoid and insecure. No matter _what_ you do, they aren't really seeing you--they are seeing their faults/insecurities and taking them out on you. Bottom line--if they consistently don't trust you on something as crucial as this, it's not going to stop there. So why be bothered with their grief?
>Deering, you have even higher standards for your friends than I do for mine.<
Nope--this comes from hard experience. No friend is a friend who makes you have to constantly assuage their insecurities to the detriment of who you are.
>So why do I do it? When the chips are down, you need friends. You need to tolerate their crap so that they will tolerate your crap because none of us is perfect.<
Are they friends if you have to mute yourself for them to accept you? Hell, do they even know how you really _are_? If not, how can you rely on them when the chips are down--or at all?
>Hmm. Maybe I am the good little girl because when I hit puberty my mother acted as if I was competition.<
Aha!
>Happy now, deering? You have really made me THINK.
Thank you. As a therapy session, this has been quite inexpensive.<
You're welcome. :) I brought this all up because I'm sick of the whole "married women are better than single women and they are always right no matter how insecure they are" social dynamic. Women like this enforce woman-hating restrictive social norms, and if we all had to abide by what they want, women would still be wearing corsets and not voting. (Geez, look at the number of married/ex-married women on here who swear up and down with no evidence that the woman in this letter is all kinds of a threat.) No real social advance ever came from conforming to wifey-dom and treating other women like rivals.
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And rightly so...
[Read the article: Miss dumb blond USA?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]>The giddy thrill over Miss South Carolina recalls a similar outbreak of hilarity earlier this summer over the horribly botched train wreck interview of Holly Hunter conducted by young, blond, female entertainment news anchor Merry Miller. "Look at the stupid chick! Whee! Yuk-yuk!"<
Miller (on a lesser scale) is symptomatic of the unthinking lazy journalists who have let the Bushies run roughshod without investigation or accountability. For Christ's sake, how hard could it be to do what was essentially a softball interview? Jeez, shouldn't an entertainment reporter at least be able to do the basics? And people are also sick of not-even-up-to-the-game types like Couric being passed off as if they are the second coming of Edward Murrow. No sympathy here.
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Oh, _hell_ no...
[Read the article: Should strip-club bachelor parties be men-only?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]>You read Danielle Steele,<
Oh, that's _it_. Dude--pistols at twenty paces on any green of your choice, anytime, anywhere. :P
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Sorry...
[Read the article: Should strip-club bachelor parties be men-only?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]That's "d0k0night." My apologies...
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Shoot, if they are dumb enough to stay married to these jerks...
[Read the article: Should strip-club bachelor parties be men-only?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]...they need to suck it up and stop bugging innocent bystanders. It's called personal responsibility and behaving like an adult, something even married women are not exempt from.
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For cryin' out loud...
[Read the article: My brother left his girlfriend with a 5-month-old baby]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Why do people still think that having a baby is an automatic "marriage band-aid?" Illusions die hard, for sure...