where was the back-up DNA located? The back-up petri dishes? The back-up strains? Can you zip petri dishes so they fit into smaller labs like you do bytes of information on servers?

LW can relieve herself of notion that the outcome of the entire world rests on her shoulders. Their marriage was going where it was going with or without LW's freindship.

She's done nothing wrong. Had some lustful thoughts about someone other than her busband, but not acted on them, and not relayed them to anyone. (unless you aren't telling us all about the office relations?...)

Let some sad friends ventilate. Done nothing inappropriate and said nothing inappropriate. There's no obligation to tell everyone everything. Why do you assume that? In this reality show world where everyone tells everyone everything on TV, we've created the false belief that you should tell all. No, be dignified and keep your own counsel. Respet others' privacy.

You haven't betrayed anyone. If you feel you must come clean, tell friend and wife that you've let the other ventilate a little, and am happy to lend an ear, but will make no judgements about the other considering how you're friends to all. If you feel you must, you can quickly tell freind that since you're married, you talk about your life to your husband. That's a universal rule. He's married, he knows.

Resist the temptation to devolve into a Peyton Place, reality world existance of telling everyone, getting caught up in the drama, gossiping, spreading pain.

Tell everyone you're sorry about the tough times and hope they find the solution they need. Be dignified and quiet.

There is more to this than LW is telling us.

First, R. is correct that friend crossed the line when he asked LW to keep secrets from husband.

2nd, she hints are more of a common attraction and strains to keep it in check. More there than she's admitted.

3rd, what is it you're finding so hard to keep from the others? I don't get that? You don't want to tell freind that his wife is unhappy? duh, he knows that. You don't want to tell wife that her husband is unhappy? Duh, she knows that. So what is the big secret you don't want to let out? you haven't told us that....

That's not the message.

The message is:

A relationship begun in deception is doomed to end in deception.

Could not be more wrong.

The very definition of Civil disobedience is CIVIL; NONVIOLENT.

The very nature of civil disobedience, is a quiet nonviolent refusal to obey unfair laws, like restricted lunch counters. It is a choice of one's own acions, NOT the VIOLENT act to FORCE someone ELSE to obey your choices.

The very use of intimidation or coercion of another's actions is the opporsite of civil disobedience which is nonviolent. The very use of intimidation or coercion is forcing others' actions, which is the opposite of civil disobedience.

I would NEVER want to use violence to stop people from exercising their freedoms, THAT is FACISM. FREEDOM is most precious.

If we don't want people to do certain things, we change the laws, not use force to stop them from making legal choices.

Well, since it is the MALE FRIEND who keeps ventilating, your comment is not only sexist, but wrong.

Some PEOPLE feel the need to ventilate. Some PEOPLE like to keep their own counsel. There are men and women of both types.

NO ONE's implying all you should or can do is hope the world changes the way you want.

I'm saying: use legal and nonviolent ways to make that change. And also, accept that there will always be people who act differently than you want and you need to accept that difference rather than think you have the right to force them to behave the way you want. That's facism and we live in a free county.

after we dropped a letter into the mailbox, we couldn't get it back no matter how desparately we pled with the postmaster.

We learned to live with our actions and think hard before making unretractable moves.

makes it sound most tangled than it is...

unless of course, that's what you want, an excuse to get nekkid with Male Friend.....

I never knew you were born in va, cuz

No, they haven't said that.

They said using terrorist methods should enhance the counters, be it for environmentalism or other jihad. Planting trees on arbor day is fine. Bombing universities that do genetic research is not.

It's not the view or the slant or the subject, but the VIOLENT ACT.

I can guarantee you no conservative fundamentalist would EVER consider sending their kid to a liberal inclusive camp.

"It boggles this parent's mind that someone would send their child away from their own care to spend a week with manipulative people to learn things that they are diametrically opposed to. You don't loan your children out even for potential indoctrination just because someone else is willing to pay."

He asked you that because he knows how to manipulate you and throw you in self doubt.

But what I want to know is why ARE you doing this to yourself? Why did you let a man who was violent towards to into your home? That answer deserves an answer, and after you remove him, get thee to a therapist and work on finding out why and how to change it.

I guess you are afraid to say no, even to an abuser. So get someone else to do it for you now to address the emergency. And getting him out is an emergency. Then you can start learning to say no yourself, but don't want that long to get this abuser out. Call the sherrif, have them deliver the message and PROMISE YOURSELF YOU WON'T BACK DOWN AND LET HIM BACK INTO YOUR LIFE IN ANY FORM.