Letters to the Editor
Cosmic Mojo
Published Letters: 687 Editor's Choice: 13
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delete
[Read the article: My boss forwards fluffy kitten e-mails!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]delate the emails and go on with life. If you don't like your job, sure, find another. But don't look for another job just because of the emails. If you did switch jobs just because of the emails, you'd be mighty disappointed to find out that there are a lot worse bosses than those who forward stupid emails.
There are a lot of otherwise reasonable and smart people who forward those emails. They might not even really believe them, but they forward them. Just cuz. A lot of otherwise smart people read their horoscpe every morning even though they don't necessarily really believe them. This is like that. Don't give it so much weight or meaning. Let it pass. Don't let it ruin a good job.
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get real
[Read the article: My boss forwards fluffy kitten e-mails!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I think the posters here who rant that this is highly unprofessional and would not be tolerated elsewhere are sorely naive about the real world.
Bosses are never perfect. They're humans just like us and have issues and weaknesses. And SO do their bosses, they ones who would theoretically fire them for being slightly imperfect. Get a little more experience under your belt and you'll see the wide spectrum of folks who work and don't get fired for being less than perfect.
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I confront her and then proceed to come clean on my flings in order to make her come clean.
[Read the article: My wife keeps cheating but we have two kids. Should I leave her?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]what?
the whole letter is about HER flings and then at the last minute you throw in a quick reference to YOUR flings? And SHE'S all to blame?
what am I missing?
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change the locks
[Read the article: I cared for my dad in his final months -- but who gets his car?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]don't fix the car.
Contact a realtor and sell the house N. O. W.
Then sell the car.
Distribute money to siblings as fairly as possible.
Give a modest "thankyou" check to neighbor for her help (even though it was calculated) and end any relationship with her. Period.
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be matter of fact
[Read the article: I cared for my dad in his final months -- but who gets his car?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]you can't let the neighbor in the house any more.
Dad is gone, there's no need for her help any more.
The house is in probate and must be locked up, prepped for sale.
Letting her in the house is very dangerous. She's calculating and might start removing valuables or worse.
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this stuff lola wrote is VERY important. I'm repeating her most important comments:
[Read the article: I cared for my dad in his final months -- but who gets his car?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Using legal excuses to back you up might make her respect your position more. She may not take immediate retributive steps against you, but her behavior shows that you can't bank on her integrity. She shows a sense of entitlement and lacks respect for the law, your father's wishes and you. Get someone out there IMMEDIATELY to change the locks, clear her out of the house and take the car keys. Giving her warning would allow her to prepare by stealing things, changing locks or otherwise undermining you. You've not backed up your words with actions, so your actions must now be decisive or she may try to exploit your weaknesses. She may be a generally good person who would never dream of stealing from you, but she may not realize that taking even small things from your father's home right now is theft, and that her lack of willingness to stop living in the house or driving your car is going against not only your wishes but the law. Someone needs to make this very real to her, preferably in person.
Dealing with her face-to-face would be intimidating and you could be tempted to cave to her requests, which seem to be on their way to becoming demands. Having a lawyer or an intimidating legal entity like an off-duty police officer (or even a hired security person) with you, or having them do your work on your behalf while you're safely off site, could carry the weight of law and prove that the situation is serious and that it isn't personal. She needs to be told bluntly that it's time to leave immediately and that you (or your lawyer or the police officer) must collect the keys to the car and house. Have the locks changed immediately, and install a security system if there isn't already one. If she calls and complains to you, you can say that the matter is out of your hands, certain actions are required as part of the terms of the will, etc
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keep it simple
[Read the article: It's gift-giving time, and I'm cranky about gift cards and pushy kids]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]If we really could find the perfect gift, no one would have to write "no more candles please!" Maybe those gifts weren't as perfect as you thought. Respect that. A person knows when they have too many scented candles; save a bee.
LIsting a wish list does seem a little crass, but it makes gift buying and recieving so much easier. So just be grateful for the ease and focus on enjoying family time and baking yummie cookies! Don't complain
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She also believed I was invading her privacy and was pretty angry.
[Read the article: A friend is involved in Scientology. Should I interfere?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]AND RIGHTLY SO!
We have all got to get over this egocentric belief that we have a right to tell people their religious choices are wrong. As wrong as we may think they are, we have no right to try to force others to accept our own beliefs.
I think all religous is stupid, but I don't try to influence others. I"m grateful I have the right to make my own choices and grant the same to others.
Back off. It's NOT your call. Respect her rights as you expect others to respect your own rights.
The question is not if you find her religon valid or not, but that she has religious freedom. What others think of each religion is moot. The only issue is religious freedom.
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Complicating that is the fact that we were not so close to begin with.
[Read the article: A friend is involved in Scientology. Should I interfere?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]so why DO you care about her? Sounds like you don't want to be her friend or hear about her life, just control her religious choices. All you care about is telling her not to be a scientologist and to be a christian, which is, of course the valid religion, please.
I'm an atheist, so I think all religious pratice is superstitious weakness. But I DO grant each person to make that personal decision on their own and am grateful I"m allowed to choose to reject religion as I want.
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There's also a difference between "not proven or provable" and "provably false by any reasonable standard."
[Read the article: A friend is involved in Scientology. Should I interfere?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]now THAT is funny!
Just a great example of the "all religions are bunk, except mine, which is 100% correct" philosophy which is ruining our world.