A monk told Joshu: "I have just entered the monastery. Please teach me."
Joshu said: "Pull my finger."
At that moment the monk was enlightened.

Basho said to his disciple: "When you have a Milk Dud, I will give it to
you. If you have no Milk Dud, I will take it away from you."

Two monks were arguing about whether their train was moving.
One said: "Our train is moving."
The other said: "The train on the tracks next to us is moving."
The sixth patriarch happened to be walking down the aisle. He asked them: "Would I look good in short shorts?"

A monk asked Tozan when he was eating some pretzels: "What is Buddha?"
Tozan said: "These pretzels are making me thirsty."

A monk asked Ummon: "What is Buddha?"
Ummon answered him: "Scooby-Doo."

Gasan was sitting at the bedside of Tekisui three days before his
teacher's passing. Tekisui had already chosen Gasan as his successor.
A temple had recently burned down and Gasan was rebuilding it. Tekisui
asked him: "What are you going to do when the temple is rebuilt?"
"When you're better we want you to speak there," said Gasan.
"Suppose I die before then?"
"Then we'll find somebody else," replied Gasan.
"Suppose you can't get anybody?" said Tekisui.
Gasan answered loudly: "Don't ask such stupid questions. Just go fuck yourself."

Sorry about that last one, but it was just too appropriate given the comments here today.

(Not you two.)

But..but..Everyone has a big butt. Tell me about your big butt, Simone. (Pee-wee's Big Adventure)

Let me tell you about my big butt.

It's one thing to have a friend you look up to who is well-intentioned and is basically a really good person, but who does screw up occasionally. It's another thing to have a friend you look up to who turns out to be, not only an asshole, but a selfish, sadistic, criminal asshole.

In the civilized world's view, we used to be the first kind of friend, BUT now it's obvious to almost everyone that we are really the second kind of friend, that is, no friend at all.

The most obvious observations, because they are so obvious, are almost always dissected to death by those persons whose acceptance of them would force a re-evaluation of their own beliefs. As coping mechanisms go, it could be worse I guess.

For example, all of the comments that question the validity and time frame of the Pew poll seem to think that this is the first time anybody has thought to bring this issue up in polite conversation. There are numerous other corroborating polls. Just google "us world opinion" and look at the first hundred or so links. You find out people like China better than they like the US. What the hell is that about?! Those readers of this blog who had no idea that Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo and Iraq would have such an effect on world opinion need to stop and think about how they think about things like torture, disappearance and murder, not when it comes to other people, but when it comes to their own people, their family, friends and neighbors.

The world used to think we were the good guys. Now the world thinks we are the bad guys.

As for those who are delusional enough to think it doesn't matter and we can do whatever the hell we want because we're the biggest, baddest kids on the block -- just remember what happened in the last century when one country or another copped that attitude. They wanted to be an empire and rule the earth and instead they got their asses kicked. They got put face down in the dirt. And it was the right thing to do. Now those same countries have turned out to be some of the greatest and best nations on earth. They turned from empire wannabes into enlightened, progressive societies.

The US has done a lot of terrible things over the past two-hundred years. But we've done a lot of wonderful things, too. We have the Constitution and the Bill of Rights and that makes us a democracy (sort of).

Why do I suddenly feel like Bill Murray in "Stripes"?

I'm tired of us being the bad guys. I want us to be the good guys again. I want everyone to look up to us again and to call us the greatest democracy in the world. Not for approval. But because I would rather the US helped lead the world in the direction of a thousand years of progress and enlightenment than into a great dark age filled with pain, suffering, ignorance, poverty and death.