My husband and I are dealing with his very serious illness.

I can honestly say, that we are both tapped out emotionally. We are both normally very social, fun loving people...just not right now...and we sure are not up to adding new people to our "circle". We spend much of our time with each other and that is how we like it right now, most everything else feels like an intrusion, even phone calls from friends, frankly.

I'm not the one that is ill, but I know that I am amazingly short tempered and not as concerned about inadvertantly hurting someone's feelings as I normally am, in fact, most would say I'm normally over concerned about other people's feelings.

I don't think your a bad guy LW, but I do think that you are taking it way too personal. If the guys is just cold seeming and withdrawn, and not abusive or cruel, cut the guy some slack.

The wife would not benefit at all from your confession, especially if you felt compelled to tell her his dark fantasies, and hopefully they stayed fantasies.

There could be a myriad af reasons for his suicide completely unrelated to his sex life and talking to his wife would just complicate things further.

No doubt she is having a hard enough time right now dealing with his death.

Wow, whenever these guys say they want to take "full responsibility" they do not mean "full accountability", much less punishment.

Accountability & punishment are just for the little folk, or Dems.

I totally agree about Key West, you have no where to wait when standing out by the curb, it's hot and crowded.

But Ontario is pretty damn decent. In the area, Long Beach is by far my favorite as far as "ambience", but they just don't have the flights.

ONT is easy to park at (and cheap), you can wait by baggage (with seats!)for waiting to pick up any arrivals. It's clean does lack some amenities, but is a very decent option for coming or going out of Southern California.

Okay, I also don't like the culture of anyone being offended being catered to. That being said, as the LW pointed out in the follow up letter, he's up the food chain in the supervisory chain. I don't wear a bra when I'm dressed casually, I do when I'm at work. BFD.

If you boss points out that your outfit is inappropriate or even questionable, you probably should take notice. You don't tease him, let alone suggestively...especially if the guy's a prude. That's not the same as suggesting that all women have to wear "burkas", it's plain old common sense.

If you think this is soul crushing, you better find a job where you can work from home, and/or be self employed.

I see many more young people not recognizing that they do get judged initially by their clothes. Showing up to an interview (or meeting) with "juicy" across your behind, flip flops, etc. will be what the usually older interviewer will notice first, they aren't priviledged enough to know how clever, funny, brilliant, how fast you learn, etc. until they give you the first chance.

Hillary knows that the Dem's are the lesser of two evils when it comes to union support at election time. We're trapped.

She should be careful though, that doesn't apply during the primaries, and so far, she's not off to a good start with this voter.

You do not need to work with this guy, get the hell out of there. This guy isn't worried because he knows that you can't tell on him and he's going to make your life miserable.

I worked with a real bad actor one time. He undercut his supervisor to our clients, blamed his mistakes on underlings to the point that they would get terminated (with blatant lies), and when everyone was let go after a project died, he was the sole survivor.

He instinctively knew how to come out on top, no matter what the occasion, it's easy when you have no problem lying, stealing and setting people up.

I tried to warn our boss (a brilliant, easy going, fair guy) and he thought myself and the other engineer were being paranoid and possibly jealous. The boss was fired soon after, he'd been set up with files being stolen from his desk and meeting minutes that would have helped him mysteriously being missing. I wasn't believed as I was seen as someone with an ax to grind about the bad guy.

Years later, the bad guy was going to be hired by another company I worked for and I stepped up and said that I'd have to quit before working with him again. It wasn't a threat, I meant it, the guy scared me. I found out two other workers had done the same, including a clerical worker who had interacted with him outside of work.

Move on if you have to.

"He's not her boss. Her boss is the person this guy went to to complain. Her boss okayed the outfit."

The LW wrote to clarify. He's even higher up than her supervisor and probably because of embarassment asked that person to speak with her.