LW,

I try hard not to judge, but this is ridiculous. Three dogs, in an apartment? Stain removal and cleaners could probably do some temporary damage control. There is a flooring company that advertises all over the country and they have el cheapo laminate wood that you can't damage. Also, a deferred payment plan that might work for you.

I am not sure why you wrote Cary about carpeting and stuff like this. Wouldn't Heloise or some domestic fairy type be a better springboard for this BS? If this is your big problem and you are taking time to write online about it then you need more than a clean carpet.

deering's letter and some others here are so familiar. It seems many of us were routinely humiliated in high school. Funny thing is, now that I am on the website for my class reunion happening soon, people are being kind and actually quite funny. I would not have gone 10 years ago, but 20 years later, they seem to be over themselves. I've been getting personal messages and even one heartfelt apology. A man who doesn't live where I live now sought me out and asked if I would forgive him.

Am I just being an optimist or do people change? The experience of getting in touch again in this case has been positive. I didn't think I could let this go, even though my life is very good now, but it's happening. I have rather low expectations of the actual event. Thinking that a few evenings are the culmination of 20 years is not realistic, but framing it as a night to rewrite a few things in my head will allow it to be fun.

I've not written to Cary, but have been a Salon reader for a long time, posting under different names as my subscription changed.

Maybe we should just all have stained carpets, say we've been depressed. Seems like that garners more respect than anything else because I've never seen such loyalty, solidarity and support for a LW before. If you've read Since You Asked, you know there are people who have really needed help before. Someone wrote in saying she was contemplating taking her own life and got mocked.

Basically, she was attacked.

And people didn't say anything. They let her and many other LW's get stoned by angry mobs. But if a LW wants to talk carpeting, you'll back 'em up? I recall recently reading a post that said, "I hate Moms". I thought that was a little odd. Is it all mothers in the history of the world, or just your own? There are people who log in to denounce women, men, whites, blacks, babies, trees... you name it, they'll find something to be against. Usually no one really says anything. It's as if it's OK to rail on people you've never met and who are just putting a few thoughts out there, usually to communicate ideas or support.

This is amazing! Now there are people here actually sticking up for the LW who has a dirty, excuse me, filthy carpet. I am not saying it's a bad thing, I've supported Cary and many of you against attacks from people who seemed to click in here just to be mean.

Does this have something to do with the anonymous being removed? It seems odd to have this kindness all of a sudden. Again, it's not a bad thing, but I am curious about why this particular domestic issue raised such emotion.

Heck, over in Paglia's column they call her witch, cunt and all kinds of things. Is she, really? Have you met her? Cary has endured hostile remarks and cuts that would be OK... if he were a mass murder. Now a few posts about how this domestic cleaning issue doesn't belong here and the troops show up?

Where've you been?

Thanks for this. Is there a way to block all of it out? I think I have a few ideas.

oooh, can I put dead stuffed animal heads all over my home(s) to prove what a man I am?

"Just wait until the market crashes - it could happen this week - and America finally realizes it's finally become a third world nation. The kids killed at Columbine will be the lucky ones; they never grew up to watch their own children slaughtered in the streets by marauders, as you people will."

Whoa.

As long as you don't feel as if you are hiding or making decisions that are based on fear of the unknown, then go with the (gas) flow for a while. Your letter was funny. "Wakey wakey"! Cary's response is even better, making a movie out of it. I see many of these letters in cinematic form.

Now if you found a gas station where you could watch the waves, that would be cool. Science fiction maybe. The gardener could be unknowingly transporting the pod people. OK, I'll quit. Must be the Irish celebrations going on everywhere. Maybe there are a few of us trying to make a story out of it because it doesn't sound exciting or challenging, but you said you aren't really looking for the high powered career path right now.

And about being gay, unless you live where I grew up, that shouldn't be a problem no matter what you are doing. Good luck and good for you. Last time I read a book at work was never.

I hadn't heard of this and still know nothing about the real story. That is a disclaimer for this: CP, you are hilarious! Thank you for the best laugh I've had in a while.

Have a good day everyone, and may you escape any dangerous heels.

How do I love thee, let me count the ways....

Let's start with this:

"And how much room is there in your marriage for your vagina?"