So we've got Beckham, "shhhh, just don't talk, don't say anything..."

and

Clooney, "Show me that slow release smile again."

and

I'd like to add Christian Bale of American Psycho fame, " Nice incisors!"

So, If I say House, "Tell me again how you saved her life?" it makes me smart? If Beckham, not.

If Bale, INSANE? Clooney, cliche?

Not buying it. There is no connection between what curls your toes in 2D and you. So let's have fun, shall we. It's entertainment!

Cary's letter made me giggle!

Words have no power if not spoken with intention/integrity. You can't do anything, Dear LW, to make this young man say things he doesn't want to say. Perhaps your investment in these words is not realistic in this time with this person. Most people have ways of expressing love, so if he does the things you equate with love then let it ride for a while. If you have to look really hard for those things, they aren't there.

Easy for me to say, but at my age, I would be lost in your world! The actress meets the athlete-she presumably emotional, he-logic and reserved. Oh, the train wrecks caused by attraction and attachment! I am surprised he did not hold you while you cried. Did he? I hope he knew to do that at least.

What you need and what you get aren't always going to intersect in a relationship. I hope you find what makes you feel loved. I believe that is a basic need and hope you give and get it. Don't get so caught up in the "I love you" that you forget to have a good time.

Older and Wiser said: "Many of us do things that, in retrospect, make us feel ashamed, confused, surprised at our own behavior, especially when it counters our common sense, that we "should have known better." But it's crucial to put it in perspective, get past it, and move on."

Well Hallelujah!

LW, get over this weird icky thing you participated in. Brush your shoulders off, put your chin strap on and go on with your healthy relationships and real life. We do things that don't require any goodbyes and this one doesn't get closure in a neat package. Send the widow some love in some way (anonymously) if you must, but find forgiveness from the inside.

LW,

Some things I think of when reading this letter. Things that are fun and legal and easy. In no particular order:

music

massage

climbing

herbal remedies

wine

baths

break the clocks

sex

poetry

slow food

hiking

dancing

creating art being attached to outcome

being in the moment

sound of wind in leaves

waves

lying in the grass

more music

journaling

reading

painting(anything)

stretching

napping

daydreaming

film

still more music

....this list could go on and on LW.

We are so lucky to be alive! Go! Do something outside of comfort and routine! Go anywhere! Observe and wander and have no agenda. Godspeed.

Ooops, in my list I meant to say:

Creating art WITHOUT being attached to outcome

Great distinction.

Apologies.

"Your relationship is not the stage where you display your triumph. It is instead the forest where you lose yourself in order to find yourself."

This is why I come to Salon every day. Bravo Cary! Impeccable!

LW,

There will be many times in life that you will feel these things. If you didn't, you'd not be human. The what if, the what now, the what the heck! Since you did mention "love" know that if it is real, it will last and you'll find ways to rekindle things. I don't recall having been in that situation at your age, so I have no advice. "Love" in college was chaotic and passionate in my experience.

Oh and if some posts seem caustic it was the name drop and beauty references that really don't matter in the scheme of things, eh? Since we are communicating in 2D, here on the internet, we are all just words and pretend names. We can't see you man, we won't be seeing you, so that kind of stuff sounds pretty arrogant. I bet you didn't mean it that way and you get a hall pass. Sound good?

LW,

You have my respect for digging yourself out of such a dark hole. It sounds like you are bright and worked very hard for the life you are currently enjoying. Sounds a little like my story. I bet a lot of people struggled. Except for one thing: Never did it occur to them that a loan is OPTIONAL. This letter reminded me of all the selfish lumps who used to claim bankruptcy while enjoying trips, cars, homes, schools most never dreamed of. Like so many things, it just isn't fair and that makes people angry.

I'll give you just one example of someone who used the system for his needs, then turned against it saying he owed nothing. I'll give you a hint, there was a book written fot this sanctimonious man not so long ago called _ _ is a big fat idiot. This guy went to school free on...gasp!...our tax money, and now rails against his duty as a citizen to pay those same taxes! The hypocrisy is stunning!

Lastly, think of how free you'll feel unloading your debt. Just pay it or your new nickname will be Rush.

What a way to end an era. Like a European movie, leaving us alone in our living rooms, wondering. The lyrics I'd not really thought of in that way were so perfect. The glaring man walking self-consciously into the bathroom and meadow narrowly escaping the perils of parallel parking and jay walking. Blindly loyal "4evah" sits Carm. AJ's outrageous commentary and ignorance about how it is.

Pass the Onion rings! So many loose ends.

One could alomost forget we are voyeurs and not players in NJ. Isn't that the goal of good entertainment?