Letters to the Editor
MomoCat
Published Letters: 34 Editor's Choice: 14
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Keeping the woman down
[Read the article: I Like to Watch]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Anyone opposed to a radical feminist rant, please skip to the next letter.
As John Lennon said way back when, woman is the n- of the world. Doesn't matter which society, how disadvantaged, how exploited - however bad it is for the group as a whole, it's worse for the women.
So what's a society to do when that starts to change? What happens when women aren't at the bottom anymore? You've got to find a way to get them back down there. And what better way than to make them complicit in their own exploitation?
Convince them at an early age that dressing like a slut is EMPOWERING. Convince them at an early age that guys will see their real raw power if they can see their asses, belly-buttons and tits. In fact, teach them that tits and asses are a much more powerful power than intelligence, self-esteem and dignity. Teach them that it's okay to display oneself to a guy dressed in baggy clothes resembling a burqa, as long you can tell him to fuck off when he responds to the invitation.
Distract girls from 'real' pursuits and sell them on fame for fame's sake. As Pink said, "What happened to the dream of a girl president? She's dancing in the video next to 50-Cent." Provide girls with a sub-set choices that make it look like they are empowered, but limit those choices to ones which re-inforce archaic stereotypes.
Then, wait for the backlash against all the fame-hungry, scantily clad mini-sluts - wait for the time when people (including grown women themselves) lump girls into this group and consider them too stupid to make rational decisions on their own.
And then we've come full circle: Society will make choices for women and girls, and tell them how to dress and behave appropriately so as not to appear to be sluts.
Remind me: What was the feminist movement rebelling against?
Is it a planned conspiracy? Of course not. Is it a commericialized societal trend that we've allowed to develop unchecked by strong parenting and a sense of history? Absolutely.
You want to dress like the Pussycat Dolls and take pole-dancing lessons at your local gym? Do it. But do it in the awareness of what you are perpetuating. You want to let your twelve-year-old daughter walk around in clothes that expose her ass-crack and most of her upper body? Then do it in the knowledge that she doesn't know what that really means yet.
You want to be a GRRRL? Wonderful. But you can only be a grrrl when you are woman enough to know what you are up to.
The dismay expressed at the slut trend is just tip of the iceberg. Ladies and gentlemen, dig a little deeper.
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Be brave, be fearless
[Read the article: I'm a jazz pianist, nearly 50, and I need to make some real money!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I didn't spent decades scraping by as a musician, but as a writer. I think there are some similarities, aside from the literal and figurative absence of a live audience for many writers. Here are some thoughts on embarking upon a new path:
A few years ago my frustration with the lack of progress in writing was mirrored by my frusration with what I saw as lack of progress in key environmental issues. I've always been a petition-signing, Greenpeace-donating, put-your-money-and-action-where-your-mouth-is kind of greenie, but in 2000 something just snapped (it was in Nov. 2000, to be precise, and Big Oil was just really annoying me for some reason).
So I thought I'd go back to school and get a degree in something green. I figured I could keep writing at the same time I studied at night (family, part-time work and community activities notwithstanding). And maybe my frustration would dissipate somewhat with the sense I was actually moving towards DOING something besides fretting over my lack of writing success and the general malaise brought on by the Bush administration.
This decision turned out to be a life-changing one. Oh, I'm still the same middle-aged mom, and I still haven't published the novel or screenplay that will put me on the World Map of Words for 15 minutes - but I found out that I have other skills that translate into work that makes a difference and gives me deep satisfaction, that pays decently, and that doesn't require me to measure my success by how others judge my personal creative efforts.
Actually, I always had those skills, I just needed to look at how they could be implemented from a new perspective. It has been an interesting experience to let go of the 'unsuccessful writer' identity so carefully cultivated over the years and to embrace a new one still in its formative stages.
Do I still write and dream of gaining success on that level? Sure. But meanwhile, I get to see my effort and creativity manifest in a field I care about, and which actually pays the bills.
So I agree with other writers here - find something you love and like to do. What is key here is that it might be music-related, it might not. I never thought I'd want to do anything but write. I was wrong. Be open to the adventure of something completely unexpected. Get health insurance. As a man, you can still do the whole family thing if you are so inclined - lucky you!
And as one writer here said, DO take care of your hands.