Sorry Cary, but you are talking kak.

This is a guy who dated an Evangelical long enough to have a child by her, who probably followed the same beliefs at a point.

He is not someone who has "Never seen a game" and frankly, he has a right to his non-belief too. His daughter's mother is brainwashing his daughter into believing total nonsense and he has the right to show her an alternative way of looking at things.

Here is my solution: Your daughter is going to cry. Live with it, it is healthy because it means she cares about you and sees you as a good person. Talk to her, get her interested in the things that turned you atheist. Ask her what kind of God would take faith as being more important then being a good person, because she clearly believes you to be a good person.

You don't want her hobbled for the rest of her life, and you see her religion as doing this to her, so don't kid yourself and stop being so polite about it. Convert her and if her mother complains, point out that she has hardly given her daughter the right to make her own mind up thus far herself.

would Cary be giving the same advice? I doubt it, because frankly there is a definite stink of hypocrit coming from Cary's answer here.

Hell is precisely what LW's daughter is crying about.

The argument isn't invalid in the slightest.

"Gott mit uns" Inscribed on the belt buckles of Nazi Germany's soldiers.

She is 13 years old. She hasn't been given an alternative and you guys are suggesting her father lie to her in order to make her feel better about her religion.

This kid is on the cusp of actually thinking about her religion for the first bloody time in her life (And hence maybe making her own mind up) and you are suggesting her father arrest that by lying to her and making her think he has converted thanks to her tears.

Very good way to stunt her growth as a person innit?

Those tears are healthy, they are a good sign, they mean she is thinking about it and you guys are suggesting he lie to his daughter so as to make those tears vanish.

Like that solves anything.

but it is making her think that you believe what she believes, or that you may be converted into believing what she believes.

Meanwhile not going means she has to either come to terms with the idea of her father, who she likes, going to hell for all eternity, or start questioning the validity of hell in the first place.

Conflict is not a bad thing if it leads to personal growth and this current conflict very probably will in the case of the daughter.

Well put.

Would you be saying the same thing if the writer was a Christian, and his daughter a devout Muslim?

Ignore Cary's advice. It is basically, a backhand bigots answer. He thinks you are atheist because you never looked at what religion had to offer, not because you looked at it and rejected it.

Of course, he doesn't realise that the former kind of atheist, besides being incredibly rare, wouldn't have dated an Evangelist in the first place. You tried the faith, you disagreed with it, you don't have to go through all of that again.

So here is my advice: Respect your daughter enough to argue with her. She isn't stupid, she isn't "too young" and she is capable of forming a coherent thought. Don't shout, keep your cool and argue - but don't force your atheism on her, simply present her with your opinion honestly. If she cries, so be it.

Teach her that the purpose of an argument is not to win, but to find the truth. She might not agree with you at the end of any given argument, but that value is more important then anything else you might be able to teach her.

Teach her values of honesty, and doubt. Introduce her to the assumption of ignorance, and why the first answer that comes along isn't always the right one. Don't try to convert her directly, but if you have her interest maintain it.

Going to various churches is only going to get your into trouble with your ex. It is a terrible idea, from the viewpoint that you want to maintain contact with your daughter and an Evangelical is not going to take kindly to it.

She might be okay with you being an atheist, she knows about it, and has accepted it, she is not going to accept her daughter coming home and talking about how cool the Mosque was this week.

Your sister, no matter how successful she is, is just as insecure about her talent as you are.

Don't worry about it so much, heck its possibly worrying about it that is holding you back. Let go, be your own person, and design your own stuff - and try to have fun doing it.

You got into the business because you enjoyed designing things, not because your sister got famous doing it.